Alhassanain(p) Network for Heritage and Islamic Thought

Khayreyah bint Tom Sawyer

Peace and Blessings

Whoever works righteousness, man or woman, and has Faith, verily, to him willWe give a new Life, a life that is good and pure and We will bestow on such their reward according to the best of their actions. 16:97

As a young child I wasn’t really into religion. I didn’t believe that Jesus could be God and be the son of God. It didn’t make any sense to me. So for just about all of my childhood I was non-religious. I believed that there was a God deep down in myheart, I just hadn’t found the Truth yet. But when I was in 10th grade I took a class called Religion and Human Culture. I still wasn’t much in to religion but the culture part caught my eye. Well, I took the class and my teacher said he didn’t know much about other religions (he was Christian) but he would try to get us some basic info. We had a book filled with info from otherreligions, Islam was one of those religions. I found all of the religions interesting but Islam really stuck in my mind. I ended up not passing the class due to too many absences. So, I retook the class in 11th grade. It was a little different because a different teacher taught it but I still loved it. Islam went even deeper into my heart even though I really didn’t know that at the time. I started going to the school library reading about Islam. But when I got into 12th grade for some reason I stopped researching. Maybe it was the excitement of it being my last year, who knows? But Islam was still there in my heart. After high school was out, that summer I met my husband. We met at a wedding reception that neither of us had planned on going to. I had twisted my ankle that day and he had just got back from New York. But we both went anyway. I saw him and thought he was fine :o)We kept looking at each other off and on. He came over to ask my friend to dance, she declined. He asked me and I declined too... I thought he was interested in my friend. Anyways, he did come back over again and ask me to dance, I accepted. After we danced we sat down and started talking. He asked me what religion I was, I said I didn’t have one but I was interested in Islam and had been studying. He said he was doing the same! From that day on we have been together, over 9 years! I was 18 when we met.Anyways.

We ended up moving to Michigan because he got transferred there from his job. It was there in Michigan that we got married and took shahada together, both in the same day. It was overwhelming for me. I knew Islam was right but I wasn’t really ready to accept it yet. I was happy to be married and to be aMuslim, I just wasn’t quite ready to be a Muslim. I took my shahada more for my husband than for myself. I made mistakes, we all do.

I just didn’t feel right being a Muslim and having these mistakes hanging over my head. So, finally on August 17th 2001 I decided that I had to retake myshahada, I had to be a Muslim, this time in my heart, mind and soul. So on August 19th, 2001 I retook shahada and let me tell you! The feelings wow! When Magda (the beautiful Sister who took me through shahada) said, ‘Ok, you’re a Muslim now’, I cried! I had never felt so deeply about Islam until then. I had embraced Islam totally and completely and I had never felt so good in my life until that day. That day my whole world changed and I thank Allah so much for giving me the chance to come back to Islam! Through it all He has guided me more than I will ever know. He has given me amazing gifts, my children and step daughter. He has given me a wonderful husband, a wonderful family of Brothers and Sisters masha’allah. I will never be able to thank Him enough for all that He has given to me... I would like to end this with a poem...

Dearest Allah,

I wish to thankYou for the life You have given me,

Dearest Allah,

I wish to thankYou for giving me the opportunity to see,

Dearest Allah,

I wish to thankYou for the family that You’ve given me,

Dearest Allah,

I wish to thankYou for setting me free,

Dearest Allah,

I wish to thankYou for blessing me with Your presence,

Dearest Allah,

I wish to thankYou for helping me to see Your very essence,

Dearest Allah,

I wish to thankYou for showing me the Way,

Dearest Allah,

I wish to thankYou for all of my days,

Dearest Allah,

I wish to thankYou for Your guidance and love,

Dearest Allah,

I wish to meetYou and be with You in the Heavens above.

Holy Quran 7:52 nd certainlyWe have brought them a Book which We have made clear with knowledge, a guidance and a mercy for a people who believe.

Raja Ferrell

I ama revert . I becamemuslim on July 21st of 2000. One night I was sitting at this computer, thinking of nothing, watching my screensaver bouncing around. Then for no reason I started to cry. I felt pain in my heart so bad. Then I felt and somehow heard the word Islam. Then I felt and or heard in my mind the word Muslim. Now since Jan 1 2000 I had felt the desire to change. And these changes came slow but dramatic. I quit drinking, smoking. I had the desire to cover. So I started wearing loose pants with big legs. Still I was kaffar as a kaffar can be. But on July 21st Allah thought I was ready. So as soon as these words went thru my heart I started searching online. I found out how to do shahada, I did it. I got in an Islamic chat room, of course there seemed to be everything in there but amuslim . I typed that I think I’m a Muslim, some made fun,others laughed. Then I got an Instant message from this brother. He asked if I was Muslim. I told him I think so, I did shahada, he said lets do it together, so he took me step by step thru shahada again, by then I was crying I was so happy and excited. It was like 4 in the morning, he told me to find a masjid and do shahada in front of Imam and the Imam would teach me Islam. I found one close 30 miles away, it was in a town called Riverdale. I didn’t tell anyone about my shahada, my husband came home and said, he had to go to Riverdale, my heart almost stopped, I told him I’m going too. After he took care of his business, I told him the directions to where I needed to be. We went there. The Imam was as excited as I was, he told me to bring my husband inside. I got him in there, I did shahada again. The Imam asked my husband if he knew what I had done, he said yes but he didn’t really know until later after it all hit him. The Imam told me to cover and gave me dress code hijab etc. I didn’t have the clothes, had a piece of cloth that covered my hair. I wore it. The Imam invited me to have breakfast with his wife. We went out, the women together and the brothers together. I was invited to some scholars that were with them. The imam’s wife gave me some clothes to wear, and hijabs, I was on my way. My husband flipped out late as he saw the transformation, I went from tight levis and short tops to abayas and hijab then a few months later to full hijab niqab, gloves etc.

Holy Quran 7:154And when Musa’s anger calmed down he took up the tablets, and in the writing thereof was guidance and mercy for those who fear for the sake of their Lord.

Fa’izah Jauharah

My journey to Islam, or as I call it my adulthood 17 year journey through the wilderness of darkness - really began in childhood. For as long as I can remember, I’ve had a great thirst for knowledge, and knowing about other religions was no exception. I grew up the only daughter of divorced parents - a Christian mother and, as I later learned, a Muslim father. As I got a little older I began to feel some dissatisfaction with our denomination of choice, but as a dutiful child I did as my mother told me.

The teachings of that denomination and finally Christianity itself just didn’t seem logical; and the more I read the more convinced I became that something wasn’t right. I tried asking questions of my family and of the pastors, but instead of getting answers I was dismissed as just a mere child. Somehow, the phrase “And the little child shall lead them” or “Suffer the little children to come unto me” just didn’t apply to me. Yet I just had to know. I mean I was smart, so how anyone could say that Jesus died on a Friday and rose on the third day and then tell me that the third day was aSunday, mathematically was impossible. Or even something as simple as God created the heavens and the earth and all that was upon it is six days and rested on the seventh, yet we went to church on Sunday - the day the calendar says is the first day. In my mind, these were simple questions and all I wanted were simple answers. I admit some of my questions were a bit more complicated. For example, how come some denominations allowed women to be spiritual leaders, but not the Catholic Church?

As I grew into a teenager, my questions became much deeper. I couldn’t understand, for example, how the preacher could say that we should not be concerned with material things but rely upon God to provide; yet he was always dressed in the best clothing, drove a fancy car and lived in a great house, often at church expense, while many in the congregation didn’t have much. Then let’s not even talk about tithing - I’m supposed to give 10% of my gross income, something I never actually see (okay so I didn’t have a job at the time, but still it was the principle) to God, but I was taught that God had no need of money.

Although my father wasn’t around much as I was growing up, in retrospect I realize that his influence was ever-present. I was raised in a way that was veryIslamically based. I had to dress in a lady-like fashion, I couldn’t “hang out” with boysor in the streets with my friends and I needed to account for my whereabouts at all times. I would get into lots of trouble if a boy who lived near me walked with me home from school. This was problematic when I was the manager of the boys’ track team in high school because several of the boys lived near my house and the coach insisted that they make sure I arrived home safely, otherwise they would be in trouble with him. We came up with a creative solution, but I didn’t like the idea of being sneaky and neither did they. After all, we weren’t doing anything wrong, just walking home after practice; but we did what we could to make sure that my family and our coach were happy.

Also during this time, my mother advised me or should I say ordered me, not to get involved with a Muslim man - ever. Her reason was that Muslim men oppress women. Women weren’t allowed to work, were forced to live in poverty, had to completely cover up themselves, couldn’t do anything without her husband’s permission and the biggy - might have to share her husband with several wives.

She often recounted the numerous times when before their divorce, how my father would give all his money to the mosque even if it meant I went without shoes. What she didn’t tell me was that he was not following pure Islam at the time, but was following the teachings of Elijah Muhammad and Malcolm X of the Nation of Islam, which was very popular especially during the 1960’s.

As a dutiful child I stayed away from obtaining any knowledge about Islam, because I trusted my mommy and knew she wouldn’t tell me anything false.

Finally, the time came for me to go away to college. It was during this time that my adulthood journey through the wilderness of darkness began. I tried to be like my peers and wear short, fashionable skirts and go to parties and the like. I wasn’t accepted with this crowd. I was told I was too serious - I was too focused on getting an education. Yet despite this, I got in “trouble” and mommy made the decision to get me out of it. That made me “lose it” as is often said. I started to fight and disobey my mother. I even met a Muslim man on campus. He was nothing like my mother said. He treated me like a queen and never made me feel unintelligent or childlike despite the difference in our ages. I felt that I could trust him and he wanted to marry me and take care of me. Unfortunately we got into a fight; one caused because I simply lacked knowledge of Islam and therefore didn’t understand certain terminology. I was too ashamed of how I reacted to apologize to him, so instead I found myself agreeing with my mother’s assessment of Muslim men and so I left college, and began my journey.

I thought my life would be better, but the only blessings I received were my children - and even with them I’ve had to struggle, mostly because I was a single mother. The father of my daughters lived with me for many years but because he was so busy “building his empire” as he called it, I was still a single mother doing everything for my children and working and going back to college. Finally, I found out what he was doing - he was involved in drugs and was sleeping with other women, so we parted company.

I fell apart, but then, looking into my children’s faces, I knew I had to pull myself together - if only for them. Even in the face of immediate homelessness, I pressed on. I turned to the church for comfort, guidance and assistance, as it was the only place I knew. I was blessed to be able to buy a home and give a future to my daughters. All was going along fine, but then I felt that I needed someone to ease my burden. So I met someone and got married. We had a son and things should have been wonderful, but they weren’t. The father of my daughters took me to court and lied not only on me, but also on our oldest daughter and stole my youngest with the courts permission in 1999. I’m still trying to get her home - she is in danger with him and his new wife - the woman he was sleeping around with. My marriage fell apart, because my husband insisted that he heard the voice of god and was told that I was disobedient so he didn’t have to take care of us, even to the point of denying us groceries. I know now I was in an abusive marriage, yet all of my intelligence didn’t show me that at the time. Allah, tried to show me, but I ignored Him, but Allah did not leave me even then. I was so blessed but didn’t even know it.

All throughout this time, I was still struggling to find a church where I fit in. I couldn’t. The unanswered questions and the treatment of women in several denominations was just too real to be dismissed; so I stopped going but continued as best I could to keep my faith strong. So to hear my husband say that God told him that it was okay to mistreat me and the children just made me angry and more confused, because it felt like I was being punished for doubting what the church leaders told me. He finally left and I thought God had left me too.

Then one day in June 2001, I met a wonderful Muslim man. I thought he was decreed to be my new husband. He was not - but rather he was the catalyst that led me to finally opening my heart to the life I should have been leading all along - Islam. So I read everything I could find, trying to understand just what the status of women was and what was a man’s responsibility to a woman. Not only was I surprised to find that my mother was incorrect but I was also pleased to find answers to the questions I had asked for so long. My life had new meaning and purpose. I immediately and without hesitation made shahada and felt a great weight lifted from me. My journey through the wilderness of darkness - the darkness of misinformation, wrong guidance and ignorance was over.

Knowing how my mother felt about Muslim men, I was afraid to tell her; then I realized that perhaps her feelings were deeply personal and as a loving mother she wanted to shield me from similar hurts through the benefit of her experience. I loved my mother even more at that moment of realization - but I was still afraid to tell her. Finally, after much prayer I picked up the phone and in a round about way, told her how my life had changed. I explained that for so long I had felt uncertain about Christianity and what was said, taught and written; the half-truths and untruths and the changes that had been made over the years to suit man’s needs. I further explained to her that I had found what I was seeking - peace and unaltered truth -- in Islam. I expected her to start a lecture on why I shouldn’t get involved in an Islamic lifestyle and certainly not Muslim men; instead, she quietly and calmly confirmed what I had identified as the real issue - my father’s treatment of her in his days of wrong guidance. Mothers never cease to amaze; just when you think you have them figured out, they go and do something like this. I lost my dear Mother recently, so this is now one of her last and precious gifts to me -- the gift of understanding. I had some precious last moments with her and although she was very tired, I believe that she repeated shahada while I held her hand and recited it. I love my Mother and miss her already.

During our talk, I reminded my mother of how tired and discouraged I had become with working and how I would be perfectly content to stay at home, even though she had always taught me to be independent and have my own money. Once again, my mother surprised me. She said that she knew that’s how I felt and that she respects me for it and knows that I would indeed be happy as long as I could fill my days with what is important to me. The more I read, the more I understand that the role of single mother is not what Allah describes in the Quran. I long for the life that I know I can have by pleasing Allah and doing as he says in the “perfect guidebook for life”. I know that when Allah decrees it, it shall be.

I have much yet to do to break out of ways that have become commonplace for me because of circumstances, so while my journey through the wilderness of darkness is over, my journey along the right and straight path and finally to Jennah continues. This is a journey that I can make and know that I will not be alone - although we all make the journey by ourselves to please Allah.

All I can say isAll praise to Allah. I was never alone even as I wandered through that wilderness of darkness.

Holy Quran 16:64 And Wehave not revealed to you the Book except that you may make clear to them that about which they differ, and (as) a guidance and a mercy for a people who believe.

Abdullah Islam

(Formerly ‘Kevin Combes’ Was a Born Again Christian)

To explain to you why I chose Islam, I have to go back before Islam and I was born into a Catholic Protestant family, my Father was Catholic my Mother was Protestant but as my Father ruled the house it was a Catholic family. Now I rejected the Catholic belief at a young age and from then I basically rebelled against this strict lifestyle that I was brought up in. From there I ended up on the streets, doing drugs, all messed up drinking alcohol totally shot. I was dragged out of the gutter by a man who trained me to be a weight lifter, gave me pride back into myself and told me while I was training my body I had to seek a spiritual path as well because physically it’s not enough there must also be a spiritual part of your life. So from there I went on a journey searching all the different faiths and I ended up being a born again Protestant Pentecostal Christian, preaching Jesus to everyone and anyone who would listen and who wouldn’t listen, basically I became a Bible basher.

So from there I traveled overseas, preaching Jesus, and telling people how Jesus could change their lives, save their life and the whole thing, and I used to debate scripture with people. One brother, a Christian brother, who I led to Jesus come up against me in a debate just at work. He was going on about the Trinity and he pointed out to me a simple thing that the Holy Trinity didn’t come about until 325 years after the death of Christ. Ok that’s 325 years after the death of Jesus and the resurrection to some people. It was a political move by emperor Constantine at the first council of Nicaea (325 AD) to unite the Romans and the Christians together to give him a power base, he basically decreed that Jesus was God and the Roman Sun Gods, because what happened was basically that Greek Roman mythology took over Christianity; Christianity did not take over Greek Roman mythology. The Roman Sun God’s birthday, which was the 25th December became Jesus’ birthday. The Roman’s Sunday became the holySabbath, also the counsel agreed that Jesus was the Son of God, the only begotten Father, the very God of the very God. And it also declared the Trinitarian concept, the official doctrine of the Pauline Church, which is basically the Roman Catholic Church. Now if you understand the Roman Catholic Church and the Protestant church, all the scriptures came from the Catholic Church, so all the canonical Gospels were in hands of the Catholics originally.

They made the Gospels of Mathew, Mark, Luke and John, the only four Gospels. After that they went about destroying all the Hebrew Scriptures, there were over three hundred of them, written in the original Hebrew text and many of them wereeyewitnesses accounts. So from there in 380 Emperor Constantinople of Rome made the Trinitarian base of belief, the Catholic faith obligatory to all hissubjects, and it’s been that way since. That’s why Rome is the head of the faith. In 381 the counsel of Constantinople attended by 186 Bishops completed the three present head of the Trinity, and they added the God head of the Holy Spirit, and then from there in 381 Emperor Theodosius threatened to punish all that did not believe in the doctrine of the Trinity. That’s why we have the basic Trinitarian doctrine of all Christian faiths today, except for a few who believe that Jesus was not God, Jesus was a Prophet of God, a messenger of God, similar to Islam. Now the implications of the Trinitarian doctrine are truly obvious, they have nothing to do with the original teachings of Jesus, so for me that was a major, major turning point in my Christian faith, because if Jesus didn’t become God until 325 years after his death, what can I say, simple, you know this is a man made thing.

So I went about while I was preaching Christianity, I was going to preach Christianity to the Muslims. That was my intention, and I started learning about Islam. You go to any Christian bookshop and you will find a whole shelf on Islam. You go to any Islamic bookshop or center you won’t find anything about Christianity. Well the Christians were too busy worrying about the Muslims and the Muslims were too busy getting on with their business. They’re not worried about Christians, honestly the Christians think that the Muslims want to take over the world and that they want to invade this country, and that they want to do all these crazy things; they think that they’re storing guns underneath their Mosques, I assure you I’ve been to every Mosque in Perth and there are no guns. They’re notterrorists, I don’t know a single terrorist. I have never met one, I don’t know any,I don’t know any with those views.

So as I went about studying Islam, while I was a Christian, I could see the similarities between Islam and the Bible. Many of the teachings in the Bible were not necessarily the words that were originally said, it was the actions. Like Moses, being told to take off his shoes when he entered Holy ground, now never once did I take off my shoes when going to Church. No one did. But yet you go to a Mosque and everyone takes off their shoes, for it is Holy ground. Moses on his knees before God, Now Brothers and Sisters of Islam forgive me if I do not say Allah, but I’m talking to the Christians, and I’ll just use the word God. Because Christians have a tendency to believe that they have their God, and then Allah is a totally separate God, but he is not, he is God. Allah means, the one true God. So God being the One true God, the Creator of the heavens and the earth, the Creator of all things, the Creator of you. Moses was on his knees before God, Daniel on his knees before God, Abraham on his knees before God, Jesus (peace be upon Him) on his knees before God. You go to anyMosque, they are all on their knees before God, Brother and Sisters. I go to a Church, we’re all dancing around in front of a band, like a rock and roll concert, waving our hands about in the air,this is not worship. This is rock and roll.Job accepting the will of God, good or bad. Read your scriptures, understand them,look at them. Pray morning, noon and night, the only time we prayed was going to Church on Sunday, you walk around talking, if you’re talking to God, you should have a true fear of God, understanding of him, who is the Creator, be down upon your knees, have your head in the sand.

To me these were all the things that I could see were not happening in the Church, but were happening in the Mosques; was happening in Islam. InI Thessalonians 5:17 it says pray without ceasing. Now I prayed in tongues, a gift from the Holy Spirit, this is babble, nothing more than babble. In Islam there is a prayer when you walk in through the door, a prayer when you walk out through thedoor, there is a prayer when you walk into the toilet, a prayer when you walk out, a prayer when you hop in your car, a prayer when you hop out, a prayer for everything. In Islam you pray without ceasing, every action in your life is dedicated to Allah (God). The reverence and the respect of God is not a circus act, hyped up by music and rock and roll bands. Playing and being told that the presence of God was in the place because we were all hyped up on this great music, in anointing of God simply meant that the band was playing all together, because when the band wasn’t playing, the anointing wasn’t going too well.

Now last time I spoke, I said what was Ishmael’scrime, I didn’t get to go into detail then, so now I’ll go into detail. What was Ishmael’s crime? As a Christian I was told it didn’t matter if my Mother was a prostitute, a drug addict, my father was a derelict or what ever, I accept that God accepts me, I bow down to God, I believe in God that if I totally accept him he will accept me, that it doesn’t matter where I’ve been or what I’ve done.

Yet in the Old Testament Ishmael was rejected because he was the son of a slave woman, according to the Old Testament. As the son of a slave woman, the promises of God were not attributed to him, because he was a son of a slave woman, what a contradiction in teachings. So what was his crime? None, he was born to a slave woman, yet he stills loves God, revered God, worshiped God.

I found the Quran to be the most beautiful thing I’d ever heard in the world. I didn’t understand it, but it was beautiful. When I actually read the English text… I can’t put it into words. It has no contradictions, yet the Bible is full of contradictions. Now I’m not beating up on Christianity here, I’m just telling the things that changed mylife, and the direction that I was heading.

Islam is a solution to racism. A little story for you folks, Jesus was not White, blonde haired and blue eyed. He was not necessarily black, but he wasn’t white, he was somewhere in between. Equality of the sexes, I love the fact that Islam 1400 years ago made men equal to women, it’s only 50-60 years ago that women in Western countries actually got equal rights, and yet in Islam they always have had equal rights. Islam preaches tolerance of Christians and Jews. Now as a Christian I was told to love, but yet in their actions and in the actions of how we were, the only time we entertained a Muslim, a Jew, a Buddhist, a Hindu is when we were trying to convert them. Now a Muslim will not Bible bash you or should I say Quran bash you, this statement does not exist in Islam, Quran bashing, because they don’t. If you wish to talk about it, they will talk about it, if you askquestions, they will talk to you about it. We as Muslims believe that you will come into the realization yourself, by the guidance of Allah (God).

Ephesians 6:12For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood but against principalities against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. All who were notBorn again Christians were deceived by the devil and possessed by evil spirits, this is what I was taught.

In Islam we believe that not all Muslims are going to heaven, also that not all Christians and not all Jews will go to heaven; some Muslims, some Christians and some Jews will go to heaven; those who have a love for God and follow his ways and are righteous. But to a Born again Christian all I had to do was accept Jesus, and all my sins were washed away, and I was going to heaven, free ticket. Didn’t matter what I did wrong as long as I pleaded the blood of Jesus over myself, prayed, was repentant was still going to heaven, and everybody else wasn’t going there. Now who am I to make that choice? Who is this doctrine to make that choice? The only choice is by God. He decides who goes to heaven and who doesn’t go to heaven, no one else. And only God can forgive your sins, not a man that became God 325 years after he walked the Earth. God in all of his infinite wisdom and power and glory can forgive your sins, just like that. You don’t need to accept anything; you just need to be repentant. In the Quran it says;

“Who could be better in religion than one who submits his whole self to God, does good and follows the way of Abraham, the true in faith for God did take Abraham for a friend” [4:125]

It explains itself right there. What has happened to me since I have become a Muslim?

I’ve come out of the darkness and into the light; I’m a slave only to Allah. I have complete internal peace beyond alldescription, that I never found as a Christian.

Now it doesn’t matter if I am going through hassles in my job.Doesn’t matter if I am going through hassles everywhere else. It doesn’t matter if I am being discriminated against, because I am a Muslim, which has happened in this free democratic society that we live in, for I never experienced these things until I became a Muslim. Let me tell you something about discrimination people, you have no idea about discrimination unless you are being discriminated against. You can say “oh no he’s not being discriminated against” or she’s not being discriminated against, because you’re from the outside looking in. But when you are being discriminated against, when you are being harassed, you know it, not necessarily everybody else. Why did I choose Islam?Because I simply cannot deny the truth. Islam is the truth and the truth has set me free. Ash-hadu anlaa ilaha illaallah wa ash hadu anna Muhammadan abduhu wa rasuuluh.

Thank you very much.

Holy Quran 51:23And by the Lord of the heavens and the earth!it is most surely the truth, just as you do speak.