Alhassanain(p) Network for Heritage and Islamic Thought

10 Tips for Remaining Positive (When you feel frustrated, lazy, or incompetent)

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* Post reminders of your objectives in places that you look at often (i.e. computer screens, back of the bathroom door, on your dashboard, etc.
Reflecting on your objectives and goals will lift your spirits and remind you that you will be successful at some point in the future.
* Listen to motivational speeches and read motivational stories or messages, but don't spend much money on them. Motivational speeches (as with lectures) utilize an incomplete method for teaching. Speeches, motivational or otherwise, rarely stick with us for more than a few weeks.
Their effects will weaken over time so rather than buy them, see if they are available for you to check out at your local library.
* Hang out with sharp people that are motivated and have a habit of doing what they say and keeping their promises. Nothing will bring you down faster than some blow-hard who never produces result and seldom is a person of their word. Don't expect simply bubbly, hyperactive people to motivate you, they may be fun but they are seldom motivating. The most motivational individuals are the ones that seem to smile a lot, remain positive, and exhibit actions that show self-discipline and commitment. The presence of people with extreme integrity often will inspire a person.
* Expect temporary setbacks and failures on the road to accomplishment. By doing this, you won't crash and burn mentally or emotionally at the first sign of a real challenge. You will fail at times, and you will make mistakes, that's a promise, but unless you let it beat you down, you will eventually win. Its OK to screw up ... Just learn from it. There is no other way to be considered "experienced" or "seasoned" at anything if you have never failed. Remember the old adage, "Whatever doesn't kill us makes us stronger". This statement refers to the insights gained as a result of life's adversities.
* Exercise-even if it is a short walk, 10 minutes a day-just do it every day. This will affect you subconsciously after about 20 or 30 days. If you can teach your subconscious mind, through repetition, that you can be consistent, you will begin to consciously believe that you can achieve other goals through consistent effort. Consistency is an important ingredient to success. Achieving goals is seldom accomplished without consistent effort.
* Help others achieve their goals, you may find it energizing to see another person's gratitude for your help in achieving their goal. It also makes you feel worthy of being helped by others-kindness begets kindness. This activity is charitable and reflects your integrity and sincerity as a person.
Feel pride in helping others but show only humility at their thanks.
* Stop phrasing words passively-be assertive. I don't think I can do it ... I will do it.
* Acknowledge a power greater than yourself in the universe and thank it everyday for your blessings.
Prey for guidance and strength and that you may someday reach your full potential so that you may bring some good into the world. Remain charitable in bad times and recognize that things will occur in life that are outside of your control.

How to Develop Self-Esteem
How you feel about yourself affects every aspect of your life including at work, in relationships, and as parents. It is the key to success or failure and instrumental to understanding you and others. Self-esteem has two components: A feeling of personal competence and a feeling of personal worth.
It reflects a belief in you ability to cope with the challenges of life and in your right to be happy. It is the ability to value yourself and treat yourself with dignity, love and respect.
The higher your self-esteem, the more resilient, creative and ambitious - and as a result, successful - you are likely to be.
Self-esteem is not a static condition and is always a matter of degree - no one is entirely lacking in positive self-esteem.
One way to measure self-esteem is to evaluate your ability to authentically be your true self.
-- Am I generally honest with myself... about what I am feeling: Accepting and experiencing my emotions, without feeling compelled to act on them...
In the process of growing up, confidence and self-respect can be nurtured or undermined, depending on whether children are loved and valued as they are and encouraged trusting themselves and their feelings.
Strict attentive parents who set unrealistic ever-higher goals for children can cause just as much damage as parents who are indifferent and do not demand enough.
The average child has been reprimanded an estimated 150,000 times by the age of 12. As a result, it is not surprising that people become excessively self-critical, out of touch with their feelings, and look outside rather than inside themselves for approval. This can lead to a desperate need for recognition and status from others and an internal pressure to be "perfect". People who do attain success without developing positive self-esteem go through life feeling like impostors fearing exposure.
Often people look for self-confidence and self-respect everywhere except within themselves. They say, "If only I could get the promotion, the new car, a partner, a lot of money or the admiration of others, then I would really feel good about myself. This quest is doomed to failure because it is only in the way we respond to ourselves... - giving ourselves the love and approval we are looking for - that creates that feeling of peace and success.


Develop Your Self-Esteem with Honesty, Action and Acknowledgment....

Honesty
Honesty refers to living consciously facing reality (whether pleasant or painful) and confronting rather than avoiding difficulties.
Self-honesty also requires self-acceptance, which is a refusal to deny or disown any aspect of the self, including thoughts, emotions, physical attributes and actions.
Self-acceptance is the foundations of all growth and change. It means thinking independently, valuing your own opinions and feelings rather than relying on what other people think about.

Taking Action
Taking action means taking responsibility for the fulfillment of your own desires and decisions. You set your own goals and then take steps to achieve them. This may mean gathering up every ounce of courage you have and taking the tiniest of bay steps, but that is the key to living actively rather than passively.
Completion - even of the smallest beginning step - is an important part of taking action, because it is the major motivation to taking the next step.

Acknowledging
Acknowledging includes observing and evaluating the results of your actions with honesty and compassion. It means giving yourself approval and reward for your success, even if your success only lies in being brave enough to take the action.
By being honest, taking action and acknowledging yourself for your efforts, you are not only behaving with self-respect but are creating deeper self-confidence in yourself and your abilities each time you follow through.


Some Tips for Enhancing Self-Esteem:
* Train peoples how to treat you by treating yourself well and insisting others to do so too.
* Practice positive self-talk to help improve your self-image. Allow your self-image to be like an invisible shield so that undeserved criticism will bounce right off.
* Develop courage - challenge yourself to do one scary (positive) thing each day. Taking risks builds self-esteem because facing your fears helps you to gain confidence.
* Treat yourself as a friend, with the same courtesies, love, and compassion you had given to a trusted friend.
* Ask yourself, "How can I get more of what makes me feel successful and happy in my life?" Do something nice for yourself everyday.
* Do something useful for others. Sometimes stepping outside yourself, forgetting your own worries and helping someone else can give your self-esteem a big boost.
* Believe in your own bests intentions and trust your own innate goodness. Be gentle with yourself.
* Take good care of your body. Exercise and healthy living helps you to feel good about you

DO YOU DESERVE TO BE HAPPY?
Some Tips for Happiness
Do you know how to enjoy your time and have fun? You can always feel better while thinking about a problem, doing your job at home or at the office.
Remember appreciating the present means taking full advantage of what you have.
Forget the past. Yesterday is gone. Don't think about it. But do try to keep the good memories and experiences alive. You should pleasantly accept the outcome and experience of yesterday. Don't live in the past. Enjoy the present. Now is the time to move forward and have a good time. Do not procrastinate. Today you must move forward. Right now is the time to begin. Don't delay.
Unfortunately, many of us sit down and wait for an appropriate time to show our willingness to experience joys, or expresses our joy.
People who enjoy the present are those who say, "May be tomorrow will never come. Today is the first day of the rest of my life."
Certainly it is a good idea to have hoped and a goal but if you make a habit of waiting forever. If you always expect the happiness to come to you, then you actually have deprived yourself of joy and happiness.
One way to begin a new life full of enjoyment is to get up in the morning, spend half an hour riding a bicycle or engaging in different exercises. Then stand in front of a mirror and rub your cheeks and force a big smile to appear on your face. Keep smiling and say to you, "I deserve to be happy." Shout if you can or sing.
A study once proved that singing brings joy. Singing and joy go together. You sing because you are happy and you are happy because you are singing.

Is it good to be patient? Is it good to be content and satisfied?
If being patient means waiting forever, then the answer is a big, "No". And if being satisfied means accepting misery, then the answer is also, "No."
Because this kind of satisfaction prevents you from being ambitious from getting out to look for happiness
If you are not satisfied with how you are spending your time, you can instead go to visit your friend. Plan a party, go to the swimming pool, go on an enjoyable journey, take a course in art, go on a tour and finally try to make your dreams come true. There is an old Yiddish proverb, "If you want your dreams to come true, don't sleep."
Don't wait. Live your life today. Perhaps you will never have the chance again.
Perhaps you will never have the particular opportunity you are waiting for.
A pessimist usually lacks a joy-seeking attitude and a happiness-hunting spirit. Sometimes when a pessimist is having a good time, he worries that the good times will end and expects a misfortune. Pessimists are under the illusion that happiness is not theirs, that they do not deserve to be happy. They say, "Some people are born to be happy and some are born to be sad." No, my brother; Allah did not choose you to be happy or unhappy. It is within you. It is absolutely up to you to be happy or sad.
Some of these people worry too much. Their anxiety is endless. They worry about the smallest things in life. Not only will they make life intolerable for their loved ones, but also they are the ones who suffer most. They are too worried when they feel the burden of responsibility. Shouldering responsibility is tantamount to anxiety for them. Responsibility is the source of unhappiness for them. They often cannot sleep well particularly when they are shouldering a responsibility. They fail to realize that 90% of their worries are worthless. They waster their time worrying over trivial matters. Naturally, this will create tension and, in extreme cases, mental disorder.
Anxiety is not a remedy. It is advisable that these people consult a psychologist and engage in prayers. Prayer is very helpful in occasions of anxiety.
When you have the opportunity to enjoy yourself and experience joy, you should take advantage of it. We often take what we have for granted.
Make a habit of enjoying yourself. Make a habit of exercising everyday. Make a habit of wearing a big smile on your face at all times. Make a habit of taking advantage of what you possess. And remember: Man is a slave of his habits. So if you are allowed to choose your own masters, why not choose the good ones!!
The thrill of fulfillment is one of the best feelings you can ever earn.

What is Luck?
Luck means opportunity, and taking advantage of that opportunity.
George Bernard Shaw once said: "People who get on in this world are those who get up and look for the circumstances they want and if they cannot find them they make them.

 

 

 

 

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Alhassanain(p) Network for Heritage and Islamic Thought