Alhassanain(p) Network for Heritage and Islamic Thought

Chapter Eleven: Superiority

Discussing man’s superiority is necessary in defending woman’s rights, since this superiority means the absolute ruling of man in the family and his managing of his wife and children.

Man’s superiority or any other kind of superiority is a relationship among people based on the individual’s needs, desires, and opinions that are imposed on others paying no attention to others’ wants and ideas.

This kind of relationship resembles a tyrant oppressor’s relationship, since there are some hidden criteria in such relations that exist in the autocratic ruling.

One of the reasons behind superiority is the sense of self-admiration. It can be present in small- or large-scale social relations, between two people or one person and a group. Just as a ruler can rule in this way, a father or a mother can manage the family, imposing their own opinions on the other family members. Thus, the concepts of ‘tyrant’ or ‘despot’ mentioned in the Holy Qur’an aregeneralizable to any relationship based on one side’s self-admiration and oppression. It also includes any kind of disrespecting of other people’s positions and opinions.

The one, who considers her/himself better than others, humbles them, and considers their opinions wrong, is an oppressor and a tyrant in the Islamic teachings, whether s/he acts this way in the society or in his/her own family.

ImamSadiq (a.s .) said, “Anyone, who despises people and unduly imposes his power on them, is a tyrant.”134

Social or managerial self-admiration is rooted in the personal ethical vices. Pride is an inner cause of superiority-based relations, just as humbleness is a moral that respect other people and appreciate their personalities, achievements, opinions, and intellect.

We read in some tradition sources:

The Prophet (a.s .) said, “Avoid pride, because some slave may still be proud until Allah the Almighty will say: ‘Record my this servant among the tyrants.”‘135

Therefore, a proud person can be a tyrant even in the limited round of his/her affiliates, such as teacher, student, employee, employer, husband, wife, or friend.

The Holy Prophet of Islam (a.s .) is quoted to say, “Someone may be considered an oppressor even if he is in no charge except of his own family.”136

In fact, even the management of a family may be autocratic. Such Islamic teachings refer to superiority of one person in the family that is when man or woman acts autocratically and imposes his/her ideas and wants on others.

ImamSadiq said, “Be humble before your teachers and not be tyrant scholars, that your untruth may take away your truth.”137

Scholars and professors can have autocratic relations and behave superiorly with theirstudents that is unlike the humble nature of man.

The satanic self-admiring autocratic tendency (and its consequences that lead to the belittling of others) is somethingundivine and it results from the weak faith in Allah. In fact, the one, who knows the Creator’s greatness, accepts Him as the Creator of all the creatures and the Keeper of all these creatures in the future, does not consider himself independent ofand better than other people.

Imam Ali (a.s .) said, “One, who knows the greatness of Allah, should not see himself as great.”138

For avoiding any autocratic behavior when in power, one should think of Allah’s infinite Power, so that his ending power does not make him neglect Allah’s ever-lasting Might.

ImamKadhim (a.s .) said, “When you remember your power over the people, remember Allah’s Power over you tomorrow (on the Day of Judgment).”139

The inhumane autocracy may happen in the simplest forms of social life as well as in the most complex forms. We read in some tradition sources:

The Prophet (a.s .) said, “Beware of pride, because pride may exist in someone who even if has nothing but a cloak on him.”140

ImamSadiq (a.s .) has narrated a story from the Prophet’s life, which shows the conceptual variety of tyranny and oppression.

“Pride may exist in any race and kind of people...The Prophet (a.s .) was passing in some road in Medina when there was a black woman who was collecting dung. She was asked to clear the way, but she said, ‘The way is very wide.’ Some men wanted to push her away, but the Prophet (a.s .) said, ‘Leave her alone because she is arrogant.”‘141

SheikhMajlisi has explained this last phrase as: “... She is proud and arrogant.”142

If someone has not trained his/her own soul, he or she may become arrogant. Neither empty-handedness nor knowledge can prevent this vice. Of course, it is more limited in weaker people and more extended in powerful ones. This vice may even exist in some scholars and scientists, since their social relations are wider and they present their opinions in vaster managerial circles.

Imam Ali (a.s .) said, “Fear Allah, fear Allah for the bad end of pride; it is the greatest trap of Satan and his biggest plot that overcomes the hearts of men like fatal poisons. It does fail or leave no one; neither a scholar for his knowledge,nor a poor man with his rugged dress ...”143

So any relationship has a tint autocracy, arrogance, or self-deceit that lead to the degrading and belittling of people is rejected in Islam.

ImamSadiq (a.s .) narrated from the Prophet Muhammad (a.s .) his saying:

“I curse seven kinds of people whom Allah and every responded-to prophet curse (one of them is he) who rules with arrogance in order to honor those whom Allah hasdegraded, and to degrade those whom Allah has honored ...”144

Any kind of management should be away from seeking arrogance and superiority. Two individuals, regardless of their apparent scientific, religious, financial, and social differences, should have equal relations.

Islam has warned the people who think they can gain higher social positions and more supporters by autocratic methods. In fact, it is humbleness that raises man’s position, gains support for his opinions, and confirms his social base. Hence, those who want to gain more respect in their management realms, small or large, should replace autocratic behavior with humble one. Men, for instance, should avoid superior behavior in the family.

Imam Ali (a.s .) said, “Humbleness brings you gravity.”145

The Prophet (a.s .) said, “Surely, humbleness brings sublimity, so be humble that Allah may raise you high”146 .

By being humble and respecting others’ thought and character, all opinions are benefited from and everybody participates in all activities. This way, all the activities are done collectively and supported by public power, and thus the public power replaces the individual power.

Imam Ali (a.s ) stated, “With humbleness all affairs are carried orderly.”147

By humbleness and avoiding of arrogance and self-admiration, friendship and love spread among the people of a society (whether small or large), and the safety and soundness of the society become certain, and collective relations are stabilized.

Imam Ali (a.s ) said, “The fruit of humbleness is love, and the fruit of pride is curse.”148

Imam Ali (a.s ) also said, “Humbleness brings you safety.”149

Imam Ali (a.s ) said, “Try to put humbleness on your heads, throw the appearance of mighty under your feet, and take pride out of your necks ...”150

Equal, and even humble, relations is the sign of wisdom in Islam, because only wise people understand the human position well and believe in human greatness. They evaluate human beings by their humane characteristics, rather than temporary social, economic, or political status. Therefore, wise men and women avoid superiority in relations, which is the outcome of self-admiration. They treat all the people of all social classes humbly.

Imam Ali (a.s .) said, “A wise man humbles himself and he is raised high, and an ignorant one raises himself and he is lowered.”151

This is a great lesson of Islam to people that any kind of autocracy (that leads to superiority) prevents growth of the human wisdom. An arrogant self-admiring person trusts and relies only on his/her own mind, not consulting with others, thus s/he is deprived of more knowledge. This way, an arrogant one is always confused in solving the life problems. S/he is also deprived of new ways and solutions of wise people, because no one knows everything.

ImamKadhim (a.s ) said, “Surely, a seed grows in the plain and not in the hard rocks. So is wisdom; it grows in the heart of a humble person and does not grow in the heart of an arrogant proud one, because Allah has made humbleness as the tool of wisdom and made pride as the tool of ignorance.”152

Materializing the human rights -the base of social relations- is possible by right relations. Violation of the human rights, on the other hand, happens because of superiority and autocracy in relations.

ImamSadiq (a.s ) narrated from the Prophet (a.s .) his saying, “The greatest of pride is the despising of people and ignoring the truth.” The Prophet (a.s .) was asked what the meaning of the despising of people and the ignoring of the truth was, and he said, “It means ignoring the truth and criticizing its people ...”153

Because of the importance of this issue, another statement of the Prophet (a.s .) is mentioned here:

The Prophet (a.s .) said, “Pride is to desert the truth and seek other than it, and look at people and see that no one’s honor is like your honor and no one’s lineage is like yours.”154

The main reason for despising people and violating their rights is the disrespecting of the human personality of their persons, as is mentioned in some Islamic teachings:

ImamSadiq (a.s .) said, “Pride is the deserting of the truth and the despising of people.”155

Ignoring the truth and denying it is autocracy. Avoiding pride and superiority is the main factor of seeking the truth and avoiding the violation of others’ rights, either in a large society or a small society of family.

The Prophet (a.s .) said, “Be humble so that no one may oppress the other.”156

When man believes in other people’s personalities and positions, he regards himself less important and sees others better than him. Therefore, he respects their opinions, actions, and rights. This way, superiority and autocracy do not appear in the social relations. Such people believe that everybody has an opinion. Even in a family, everyone can talk about his/her opinion, so that the family members find out new solutions and guidelines, and thus they shall have a warm life.

The believing in the human personality and value has also a deep effect in worshipping Allah. The worship of autocrat and proud people is not accepted, since pride leads to the lack of belief in others and removes the essence of the loyalty to Allah.

ImamSadiq (a.s ) said, “Allah the Almighty has said: ‘Surely, I accept the prayer only of one who is not arrogant and proud towardsMy people.”‘157

These were instructions for the kind of social relation with all people. There are special teachings about the quality of relations between man and woman in the small society of ‘family’ as well. These teachings necessitate respect, mutual understanding, and avoidance of autocracy. They also indicate that neither man nor woman is superior in the family relations; the true criteria in personal and collective relations are understanding, consultation, value, insight, and knowledge. The family management should be based on understanding and capability.

When some woman asked him what the women’s rights over men were, the Prophet (a.s .) replied, “My brother Gabriel (a.s .) often and always recommends me about women, until I thought that a husband has no right to say to his wife even “ugh”. (He said to me), ‘O Muhammad! Fear Allah the Almighty as to women, for they are deposits in your hands. You have taken (married) them by the covenant of Allah the Almighty, and so they have obligatory rights on you for what you have get lawful of their bodies and enjoyed their pleasures, and for that they bear your children in their inners until they suffer bitter labor (of childbirth) because of that. Therefore, be kind to them and delight their hearts, so that they continue living with and assist you. Do not force them to do anything (they hate), do not make them angry, and do not take back anything from what you have granted to them, except with their satisfaction and permission ...”158

Some phrases of the Prophet’s statement said by Gabriel deny the imposition of husbands’ opinion upon the wives, such as ‘delight their hearts!’ or ‘Do not force them to do anything the hate!’ The ending phrase, too, rejects men’s superiority over women. Islam orders men to get permission from women for taking their property, so it is clear that their opinion, mind, and mood should be taken into account in all other issues, too.

In sum, these Islamic criteria are incongruous with the least amount of men’s superiority and autocratic behavior.

The ‘goodness’ principle was also discussed in previous chapters. This principle rejects any superiority of man in the family, since it is in contrast with the ‘goodness’, respect, and the value of woman’s personality.

Chapter Twelve: Additional Advocacy

In this last chapter of ‘supporting woman’s rights’ it is worth mentioning that the Islamic teachings have widely advocated woman, more than her legal rights and far better than the feminism movements. In fact, these teachings are ‘in addition to the rights’. All the cases of such rights are innumerable; only some are mentioned here:

Equality between children

Equality is a doubtless Islamic principle, which is applicable to all fields of life and all people. According to some traditions, equality should be considered even in paying attention to and looking at people.

Equality in the family and among the children is emphasized too:

One day, Prophet Muhammad (a.s .) saw a man with two kids. The man kissed one of his children and left the other. Then, the Prophet (a.s .) said to him, “Would it not be better to treat them equally?”159

The Prophet of Islam (a.s .) has emphasized the treating of family members equally:

The Prophet (a.s .) said a man who had granted something to one of his children, “Did you give the same to all your children?” That man replied, “No!” The Prophet (a.s .) said, “Fear Allah and treat your children justly!”160

Though equality is emphasized in Islam, the Islamic teachings sometimes permit to overlook the origin of equality in dealing with daughters and sons:

The Messenger of Allah (a.s .) said, “When one of you goes to the bazaar, buys something, and brings it to his children, let him first begin (in distributing it) with the daughters ...”161

We understand from this Prophetic speech that girls are more preferred.

It is also narrated in some traditions:

The Prophet (a.s .) said, “Treat your children equally in giving. If I wanted to prefer, I would prefer women.”

That is why the great author ofwasail al-Shi’a has called this chapter of his book: “The Chapter of the recommendation of buying gifts for wife and children and beginning (in distributing them) with daughters”.

Sentimental Treatment towards Daughters

The parents’ kind treatment to their children is recommended in Islam, but it is more recommended towards girls:

ImamRidha (a.s ) narrated from the Prophet (a.s .) his saying, “Allah the Almighty is kinder to females than He is to males no one delights a woman of his near kin, except that Allah will delight him on the Day of Judgment.”162

As a result, this chapter ofWasa’il al-Shia is entitled: “The Chapter of the Recommendation of being more kind and compassionate to girls (than to boys)”. And this is an evident privilege for woman and an exception to the law of equality.

Woman and the Position of Motherhood

In the Islamic teachings, father and mother have very high positions and should be honored. As for mother, this attention is more emphasized and that she has a higher position than the father’s.

The Prophet of Islam (a.s .) said, “If you are offering a recommendable (not obligatory) prayer and your father calls for you, do not cut it (the prayer), but you can cut it if your mother calls for you.”163

The Prophet (a.s .) said, “The Paradise is beneath the feet of mothers.”164

ImamBaqir (a.s ) narrated, “Prophet Moses (a.s ) begged Allah saying, ‘O my Lord, advise me!’ Allah said to him, ‘I recommend you about (being kind to) your mother.’ Moses (a.s ) asked again, ‘O my Lord, advise me!’ Allah said to him, I recommend you about your mother.’ The third time Moses (a.s .) asked, ‘O my Lord advise me!’ Allah said to him, “I recommend you about your father!’ ImamBaqir (a.s ) stated, “That is why two thirds of kindness and dutifulness should be for the mother and one third for the father.”165

ImamRidha (a.s ) said, “Know well that the right of mother is the most essential and most obligatory right on you, because she bears the hardships of pregnancy like no one else. She delightfully and wholeheartedly cares for her child and resists all the problems that no one can ever be patient with. She is satisfied to remain hungry but her child satiate and thirsty but he is quenched. She remains without clothes, but her child clothed. She puts him in the shadow and she remains under the sun. So let gratefulness, dutifulness, and kindness be to her as much as that; though you cannot satisfy the least of her due right except with the assistance of Allah.”166

ImamSadiq (a.s ) narrated that one day a man came to the Prophet Muhammad (a.s .) and said, “I had a daughter whom I brought up until she became adolescent. Then I dressed and adorned her with fine clothes and ornaments and took her to a well. I threw her to the bottom of the well. The last word I heard from her was ‘O father!’ What is the ransom of that?” The Prophet (a.s .) asked him, “Is your mother alive?” The man said, “No!” “Do you have a maternal aunt alive?” the Prophet asked. The man said, “Yes!” The Prophet (a.s .) then said, “Be dutiful to your aunt, because she is like your mother and this can ransom what you had done.”167

Allama Majlisi says, “This tradition shows the preference of the mother and her relatives to father and paternal relatives. It also indicates the importance of dutifulness to maternal aunt among other relatives of the mother.”168

This statement of the Prophet (a.s .) shows the greatness of motherhood and the most remarkable Divine position of woman. The major sin of killing one’s child, which seems too cruel and obscene to be forgiven, is forgivable only by doinggood to the mother or the maternal aunt. Making them happy is the compensation of this major sin. This shows the importance of the mother and then the aunt.if the mother is not available, the aunt replaces her, but not even the father, the paternal uncle, or any other male relative.

Another worthy point is that the only reparation for such a major sin is kindness and dutifulness to the mother or the aunt, and not their prayer. In other words, only their happiness makes up for this cruel sin and brings about Allah’s forgiveness.

ImamSadiq (a.s ) narrated, “One day, someone came to the Prophet (a.s .) and asked, ‘O messenger of Allah, to whom should I be pious?’ The Prophet (a.s .) said, ‘To your mother.’ The man asked, “then to whom?’ The Prophet (a.s .) said,To your mother.’ The man asked again, ‘then to whom?’ The Prophet (a.s .) said, ‘to your mother.’ Then the man asked, ‘then to whom?’ The Prophet (a.s .) said, ‘To your father.”169

Allama Majlisi says, “Due to this tradition, it is derived that three fourths of kindness and piety should be for the mother. It is also said that it is to exaggerate in being kind to the mother. The reason behind that is clear, because the mother tries and tolerates hardships for her children more than the father. Some verses in thesura ofLuqman confirm this fact.”170

ImamRidha (a.s ) narrated from his father from ImamSadiq (a.s ) his saying, “If Allah knew something less than (ugh), in order to give up theundutifulness to parents,He would surely mention it.”171

As it is clear, the holy Qur’an mentions the mother’s rights more than the father’s.

(AndWe have enjoined on man doing of good to his parents; with trouble did his mother bear him and with trouble did she bring him forth; and the bearing of him and weaning of him was thirty months.)172

“Doing of good to the parents is not dependent on their belief or religion; even if the parents do not follow the true religion, serving and respecting them is necessary according to the clear commands of the Qur’an.”173

This advocacy of woman, as mother, is an Islamic principle. Now, compare it with the claims of the western feminists and their method of supporting woman in the western society! The western society treats old men and old women in a bad way and teaches this to the society at large:

“... Today’s society is very indifferent to old people. To me, this is the first civil society in which old parents are not available in their grown-up children’s homes. Surprisingly, they do not condemn it. If we look at such bad and immoral behavior from a non-western point of view, we would find it so obscene ...”174

The outcome of the western capitalism’s behavior toward the old is their sadness and loneliness in the aging process, which may lead to horrible suicides, leaving a stigma on the face of the present century’s humanism of the western capitalist systems.

“... The suicide rate among old people is the lowest rate in Iran, compared to the same statistics of the West. The reason for this may be the strong family ties and the great respect to the old in the Iranian culture.”175

The western capitalism is based on capital and profit, and not on the human and spiritual values, and still boasts of defending the human rights.

Therefore, it is evident that a mother woman has more rights than the father man does. The question here is that: have the extremist supporters of woman’s rights really defined such rights for her? Or could women have reached the high position that Islam has taken them to?

‘Treating women kindly and taking much care of them’ is an Islamic advocacy, in addition to the original rights. The Holy Qur’an states:

(... And treat them (women) kindly.)176

As we have mentioned earlier, ‘goodness’ (or kindness) includes observing not only the legal rights, but also the humane-ethical values. If some people treat woman only as far as her legal rights, they do not follow theQur’anic command, because ‘goodness’ is more than the usual and specified legal rights.

The Last Will

Great men mention their best and most valuable experience at their last moments of life and recommend of the most important principles and most necessary matters of life. Therefore, it is very interesting that according to Imam Ali (a.s ) the last will of Prophet Mohammad (a.s .) was about women.

ImamKadhim (a.s ) narrated from Imam Ali (a.s ) his saying, “Fear Allah! Fear Allah as to women! Because the last word of your Prophet (a.s .) was: ‘I recommend you to be kind to women ...”177

Following the prophet’s way, Imam Ali (a.s ) emphasized advocating women’s rights and safety, using important phrases, especially the name of the Almighty ‘Allah’, which is above any other word. It means remember Allah or fear Allah in your behavior towards women and in observing their rights.

These two unique and divine figures mention the woman’s rights in their last wills. It shows the importance of the woman’s rights in Islam that are much more than the positive laws of defending the rights of woman of nowadays.

The Cause of Blessing

Women and girls are the cause of Allah’s blessing and mercy.

ImamSadiq (a.s ) said, “When a girl is born for a man, Allah sends an angel who spreads his wings over the girl’s head and chest... and one who spends on her is helped (by Allah).”178

Some families, especially in the past, considered daughters a burden, because they could not work and earn money. Sons then worked and daughters remained at home. The Infallible Imams (a.s ), however, stressed that though women or daughters remain at home and do not do economic activities, they bring about Allah’s blessing and mercy.

Once,Ishaq binAmmar asked ImamSadiq (a.s ): “Is the tradition narrated by people true that someone came to the Prophet (a.s .) complaining of his poverty and the Prophet (a.s .) recommended him to get married... until he ordered him of that for three times?” ImamSadiq (a.s ) said, “Yes, it is true. Livelihood comes when there are women (wives) and children (in one’s house).”179

Better than Jihad

The Prophet of Islam (a.s .) often declared that the serving of mother would be better than jihad (the holy war). Jihad and its value in Islamis beyond any doubt. It is the most valuable activity according to some traditions. Every worthy activity may have less value than another worthier one, except jihad and the martyrdom in the way of Allah, which is the best activity. However, one night of being with one’s mother and serving her is considered worthier than one year of jihad along with the Prophet (a.s .).

One day, a man came to the Prophet (a.s .) and said, “I am an active young man and I like to go to jihad, but I have a mother who hates that.” The Prophet (a.s .) said to him, “Go back home and stay with your mother. By AllahWho has sent me with the truth as prophet, her (the mother) delight with you one night is better than your jihad in the way of Allah for one year.”180

Gabriel and Women

Gabriel (a.s .), the Revelation Angel, always recommended about women. This is mentioned in this Prophet’s tradition:

The Prophet (a.s .) said, “Gabriel often and always recommended me about woman, until I thought that divorcing her would not be allowed at all, except because of a proved sin (adultery).”181

The word ‘always’ in this tradition is very clear; it means that Gabriel recommended about women’s rights any time he came down to the Prophet (a.s .), advocated them, and reminded the Prophet (a.s .) of their concerns. This was so much repeated and stressed that Prophet Muhammad (a.s .) thought that the divorcing of women was forbidden, except in case of an obvious adultery. And this is another case of the Islamic advocacy of women more than their usual rights.

The Criterion of Preference

The criterion of preference, value, and nearness to the position of the Prophet (a.s .) in the Hereafter is the doing of good to women and wives.

The Prophet (a.s .) said, “The nearest of you to me in my sitting place on the Day of Judgment is the best of you to his wife.”182

Prophet Muhammad (a.s .) also said, “The best of people in faith are those who are the kindest to their wives, and I am the kindest of you to my wife (wives).”

This behavior of the Prophet (a.s .) is the criterion for superiority and preference in Islamic.

The Great Reward

In the Islamic teachings, great reward is promised to be given in the afterlife to those who tolerate their wives’ anger and bad-temperedness, do not seek to avenge on them, and do not separate the family by divorce.

ImamSadiq (a.s ) narrated from the Prophet (a.s .) his saying: “One, who is patient with his wife’s bad temper seeking the reward of Allah, Allah will give him (as) the reward of the grateful servants.”183

Imam Ali (a.s ) mentions some behavioral, conversational, and thinking faults of some women in a sermon ofNahjol Balagha . He stresses the doing of good to such women:

He said, “Humor them (women) in any case and speak to them kindly that they may improve their behaviors.”184

As we see, kind and courteous treating is recommended even towards women with bad behavior and conduct, but not violence and revenge. The statements of the Commander of the Believers (Imam Ali) (a.s ) also indicate that ethical and humane treatment is an educational principle. This is a delicate point in the family relations for changing a bad behavior with logical speech and conduct.

Women’s Artistic Feelings

Husbands should respect their wives’ artistic feelings, not imposing their own mood on the family life.

SheikhKulayni in his book al-Kafi 185 narrates a tradition from ImamBaqir (a.s ) under the chapter “make up and ornament”. This constructive tradition is about the behavior of ImamHusayn (a.s ) towards his wife:

ImamBaqir (a.s .) said, “One day, some people came to (Imam)Husayn bin Ali and said to him, ‘O son of the messenger of Allah! We see some things in your house that we hate.’ There were simple carpets and cushions in his house. He (ImamHusayn ) said, ‘We get married to women and pay them their dowries by which they buy whatever they like that we have nothing to do with it.”‘186

It is clear that according to the Islamic criteria this kind of life is not luxurious extravagance, which is forbidden and not allowed for any Muslim. The phrase ‘simple carpets’ in the tradition implies the same thing, too.

Keeping away from the forbidden extravagance, the rest of lawful and moderate furniture is up to women’s taste and artistic feelings. They can decorate the house as they like and feel beauty. This is the most amount of respect to women’s thought, understanding, and taste in the family, denying any imposition and superiority of men.

When two different tastes exist in the family, sometimes men’s tastes and feelings overcome the women’s. This is in fact a non-Islamic moral, contrary to what was mentioned about the life of ImamHusayn (a.s ).

Woman’s opinions should also be taken into account concerning food and men should follow their family’s taste. This has been stated in the following Prophet’s tradition.

The Messenger of Allah (a.s .) said, “A faithful man eats as his wife likes, but as for a hypocrite, his wife eats as he likes.”187 This is another moral of true Muslims, who regard their wives’ artistic feelings and tastes, contrary to hypocrite people. Can we find such importance and value given to women in the western feminist movements? Do they really advocate women?

Love of Women and its Position in Faith

ImamSadiq (a.s ) said, “Whenever one loves his wife more, his faith increases.”188

ImamSadiq (a.s ) in another tradition has compared the love of the Divine leaders with the love of women. He said, “... whenever he (an adherent) loves us more, he loves women more.”189

Keeping in mind that Islam denies excessive lust as the only goal of marriage, the meaning of such traditions becomes clearer, proving the value of compassion to women. Loving women approaches people to the position of the Prophet (a.s .) in the Hereafter, too.

The Prophet (a.s .) said, “The nearest of you to me in my sitting place on the Day of Judgment is the best of you to his wife.”190

It was pointed out that one’s faith depends on the kind of one’s behavior toward women; serving and treating them kindly promotes one’s position. As was mentioned in part (the Criterion of Preference) of the same chapter, the Prophet (a.s .), the ever-best one in ethics, was the kindest of all to his family, and this is the criterion of the Islamic beliefs.

One’s religious perfection depends on marriage, too. The Islamic teachings emphasize marriage and the marital relations as perfection of one’s belief. Abandoning the marital relationship, on the other hand, is a destructive factor and a non-Islamic moral. In other words, leaving the society and living a life of loneliness is incongruous with the Islamic teachings. Only one tradition is sufficient in this regard:

ImamSadiq (a.s ) narrated from the Prophet (a.s .) his saying: “One, who gets married, preserves a half of his religion...let him fear Allah in the other half ...”191

Thus, the true faith is guaranteed by marriage and marital relations, while deserting marriage is a lack in faith. This completing role is a great position given to woman in Islam, and not in any other school of thought or other religion. The playing of this role is possible in two ways; either the woman completes her husband’s faith, or the marital relations develop and maintain the faith. Anyhow, the value of woman and her vital role in maintaining and strengthening the religious beliefs become manifest.

A Half of the Martyrs’ Reward

The human activities and attempts have different values and hence require different rewards. The highest value and reward belongs to the martyrs’ sacrifice of their lives.So few activities may have as a half of the reward of martyrdom. The Prophet (a.s .) has set such a reward for women’s work at home:

One day, some man came to the Prophet (a.s .) and said, “I have a wife who welcomes me when I come home, and escorts me when I leave. When I am sad, she asks me,Why are yousad ? If you are worried about your livelihood, know that our sustenance is not in your hands. And if you are worried about your Hereafter, may Allah increase your sadness.’ Prophet Muhammad (a.s .) said to him, ‘Surely, Allah has laborers, and this (wife) is one of His laborers. She shall get like the half of the reward of martyrs.”192

Woman’s work at home and her kind behavior to her husband is as working for Allah and it equals a half of the reward of martyrdom; a position far above the specified rights of women.

Instances of valuing and advocating women are numerous in the Islamic teachings, only some of which were mentioned in this cursory research. In these last lines, a tradition of the great Prophet of Islam (a.s .) deserves to be pointed out:

The Messenger of Allah (a.s .) was informed ofSa’d Ibn Ma’ath’s death. Hearing this, the Prophet (a.s .) hastened toSa’d’s house along with his companions. The Prophet (a.s .) ordered to washSa’d’s body while he (the Prophet) was leaning to the door (looking sadly).Sa’d’s body was washed, embalmed with camphor, enshrouded, and put in a coffin. Then the Prophet (a.s .) followedSa’d’s body (to the graveyard with others) without his shoes and cloak. He sometimes carried the right side of the coffin and sometimes the left side, until they reached the graveyard. The Prophet (a.s .) then came down in the grave, put the body inside it, placed bricks, and frequently said, ‘Give me some bricks! Give me some mud!’ He leveled the bricks by putting mud between them. Then, he poured soil on it and smoothed its surface. He said, “I know that this grave would become old and ruined, but Allah likes His servants when doing something to complete it properly ...’

ThenSa’d’s mother said, ‘OSa’d ! May you enjoy theParadise! ’ The Prophet (a.s .) told her, ‘Be quiet! Do not judge on your Lord’s verdicts!Sa’d is being afflicted by the pressing (of the grave) ...’ Prophet Muhammad (a.s .) returned and people followed him, asking, ‘O messenger of Allah! We saw that you did toSa’d what you have never done to anyone else; you followed his dead body with no shoes or cloak, ordered to wash his body, offered the prayer on him, and put him in the grave yourself. Then, you said thatSa’d was afflicted by the grave pressing! The Prophet (a.s .) said, ‘Yes, that is right, because there was something bad in his treatment toward his wife.”193

Such respect and valuation from the Prophet (a.s .) implies thatSa’d was certainly not sinful, disobedient, or oppressor servant, not violating the obligatory rights of his wife and family. If he was so, the Prophet (a.s .) would undoubtedly not regard him so highly or behave so respectfully in his funerals, but would behave normally as toward others.Sa’d was very pious Muslim and he certainly observed the rights of his wife and family. The words of Prophet Muhammad (a.s .), however, are about something more than the normal rights; it was the observing of ethical values in treating women. In fact,Sa’d was pressed in the grave because he was not good-tempered and humorous with his wife.

These delicate criteria exist in no other school, but in Islam. In the end, it would be fit to mention a high and valuable saying of SheikhSaduq , whose deep knowledge of Islamic sciences is manifest to everyone. The nearness of his age to the age of the infallible Imams (a.s ) makes his narrations still more authentic. In defining the obligations and criteria ofShiism , he says, “... from the conditions of theTwelver Shia are ‘certainty’ (absolute faith in the oneness of Allah) ‘trustworthiness to good and bad people (giving back deposits to their faithful and unfaithful owners)’ ‘and being kind to women’.”194

Those who claim to beShi’a should follow the principles ofShiism principles and treat women accordingly.