Chapter 5: Ornamentation and Playing
5.1: Ornamenting Children
373. al-Kafi, narrating from Abu Sabah who said:“I asked Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) about ornamenting children with gold and he (a.s.) said: “‘Ali ibn al-Husayn [al-Sajjad] (a.s.) would put gold and silver ornaments [jewellery] on his children and women.”
374. al-Kafi, narrating from Husayn ibn Khalid who said:“When I asked Abu al-Hasan al-Ridha (a.s.) about when to congratulate for a child’s birth, he said: ‘When Hasan ibn ‘Ali (a.s.) was born Gabriel descended on the seventh day to congratulate the Prophet (s.a.w.) and ordered him to choose a name and nickname for him, shave his head, sacrifice an offering and make a hole on his ear. The same thing happened when Husayn (a.s.) was born, where on the seventh day Gabriel came to the Prophet (s.a.w.) and ordered him to do the same things.”
He then said:“They had two ringlets on the left ear. The hole in the right ear was on the earlobe and the hole on the left ear was on the upper part. The right ear had an earring (qurt) and the left ear had an ear ornament (shanf).”
تَزيينُ الأطفالِ
373. الكافي عن أبي الصّباح: سَألتُ أبا عَبدِ اللهِ عليه السلام عَنِ الذَّهَبِ يُحَلَّى بِهِ الصِّبيانُ، فَقالَ: كانَ عَلِيّ بنُ الحُسَينِ عليه السلام يُحَلّي وُلدَهُ ونِساءَهُ بِالذَّهَبِ وَالفِضَّةِ
374. الكافي عن الحسين بن خالد: سَألتُ أبَا الحَسَنِ الرِّضا عليه السلام عَنِ التَّهنِئَةِ بِالوَلَدِ مَتى؟ فَقالَ: إِنَّهُ قالَ: لَمّا وُلِدَ الحَسَنُ بنُ عَلِيٍّ عليه السلام هَبَطَ جَبرَئيلُ بِالتَّهنِئَةِ عَلَى النَّبِيِّ صلى الله عليه وآله فِي اليَومِ السّابِعِ، وأمَرَهُ أن يُسَمِّيَهُ ويُكَنِّيَهُ ويَحلِقَ رَأسَهُ ويَعُقَّ عَنهُ ويَثقُبَ أُذُنَهُ، وكَذلِكَ كانَ حينَ وُلِدَ الحُسَينُ عليه السلام، أتاهُ فِي اليَومِ السّابِعِ فَأَمَرَهُ بِمِثلِ ذلِكَ. قالَ: وكانَ لَهُما ذُؤابَتانِ فِي القَرنِ الأيْسَرِ، وكانَ الثَّقبُ في الأُذُنِ اليُمنى فِي شَحمَةِ الأُذُنِ، وفي اليُسرى فِي أعلَى الأُذُنِ، فَالقُرطُ فِي اليُمنى وَالشَّنفُ فِي اليُسرى
5.2: Praising the Playfulness of Children
375. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said:“The child’s playfulness in his childhood causes his intellect to strengthen in his adult age.”
376. al-Kafi, narrating from Salih ibn ‘Aqabah who said:“I heard the ‘Righteous Servant’ [Imam al-Kazim] (a.s.) say: “It is a recommended practice for a child to play in his childhood so that he becomes patient in his adult age.”
Then he said:“It is not right to do otherwise.”
It also narrated that the most intelligent of children are those who hate schooling the most.
مَدحُ عَرامَةِ الصَّبِيِ
375. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: عَرامَةُ الصَّبيّ في صِغَرِهِ زِيادَةٌ في عَقلِهِ في كِبَرِهِ
376. الكافي عن صالح بن عقبة: سَمِعتُ العَبدَ الصّالِحَ عليه السلام يَقولُ: تُستَحَبُّ عَرامَةُ الصَّبِيّ فِي صِغَرِهِ لِيَكونَ حَليماً في كِبَرِهِ، ثُمَّ قالَ: ما يَنبَغي أن يَكونَ إلّا هكَذا
ورُوِيَ أنَّ أكيَسَ الصِّبيانِ أشَدُّهُم بُغضاً لِلكُتّابِ
5.3: Allowing a Child to Play
377. Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) said:“Leave the child alone to play for seven years, then he is to be disciplined for seven years, and then keep him close to you for seven years. If he became prosperous then that is good, but if not, he is among those in whom there is no good.”
378. Imam al-Sajjad (a.s.) said:“The Prophet (s.a.w.) said to the two [Hasan and Husayn] (a.s.): “Stand up and wrestle each other.”
They stood up to wrestle when Fatimah (a.s.) who had gone out for some needs had come back home and heard the Prophet (s.a.w.) saying:“Again, O Hasan! Take Husayn firmly and knock him down!”
So she said to her father:“O father, what a wonder! Do you encourage one against the other? Do you encourage the elder against the younger?”
Then he (s.a.w.) said to her:“O daughter! Are you not happy that I say: “O Hasan! Take Husayn firmly and knock him down,”
while my beloved Gabriel is saying:“O Husayn! Take Hasan firmly and knock him down?”
379. al-Mu’jam al-Kabir, narrating from Abu Ayub al-Ansari who said:“I went to the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) while Hasan and Husayn were sitting in front of him on his lap playing, so I said: “O Messenger of Allah! Do you love them?”
He said:“How can I not love them and they are my two basils that I scent in this world.”
380. al-Mu’jam al-Kabir, narrating from Abu Sa’id who said:“The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) was praying when Husayn (a.s.) came in and took hold of the Prophet’s neck. Then he (s.a.w.) stood up and held Husayn’s hand and kept on holding it until he went to bow.”
381. Sharh al-Akhbar, narrating from Ja’far ibn Farwi who narrates:“The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) was sitting down with his companions when Hasan and Husayn (a.s.) came to him. They were young and they were leaping on him, so at times he would bring his head down for them and at other times he would pick them up and kiss them. A man who was in his gathering was looking at him with astonishment to what he was doing. He said: “O Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.), I don’t think I have ever kissed my child.”
The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) got angry so much that the colour of his skin changed and he said to the man:“If Allah has extracted mercy from your heart, then what can I do to you? He who does not have mercy on our little ones and honours our elders is not considered among us.”
382. Sunan al-Nisai, narrating from ‘Abdullah ibn Shaddad, from his father who said:“In one of the evening and night prayers the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) came to us while he was carrying either Hasan or Husayn. The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) came forward and put him on the ground. Then he performed his takbir and started his prayer. During his prayer he prostrated for a long time. My father said: “I raised my head and I saw a child on the back of the Messenger of Allah while he was prostrated, then I returned back to my prostration. When the Messenger of Allah finished the prayer, the people said: “O Messenger of Allah! You had a long prostration in the middle of your prayers in a way that we thought something might have happened or something was being revealed unto you.”
He said:“It was neither, but my son mounted on my shoulder and I did not like to dismount him hastily until he finished what he was doing.”
383. al-Manaqib, narrating from Ibn Shahr Ashub from Layth ibn Sa’d who said:“The Prophet (s.a.w.) was praying one day with a group of people when Husayn who was a young boy was beside him. Whenever the Prophet (s.a.w.) fell in prostration, Husayn (a.s.) would come and mount on his shoulder and then shake his feet saying: “Hie! Hie!”
When the Prophet of Allah (s.a.w.) wanted to raise his head, he would take him and put him beside him, and as soon as he prostrated again, Husayn would return on his back and say:“Hie! Hie!”
He did not cease doing it until the Prophet (s.a.w.) finished his prayers.
It was at this time that a Jew said:“O Muhammad! You treat the children a way that we do not.”
The Prophet (s.a.w.) said:“Indeed if you believed in Allah and His Messenger, you would certainly be kind to the children.”
The Jew said:“I therefore believe in Allah and His Messenger.”
He became a Muslim when he saw the generosity of someone who was of very high ranking importance.”
384. al-Mustadrak ‘ala al-Sahihain, narrating from Ya’la al-‘Àmiri who said:“He [Yahya] went out with the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) to a feast they were invited to. The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) was walking in front of the group and Husayn was playing with some boys. When the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) wanted to take him, the child [Husayn] would run around here and there, so the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) made him laugh until he took him.
He (s.a.w.) put one of his hands under his neck and the other hand under his chin, and then kissed him on his mouth.
He (s.a.w.) then said: “Husayn is from me and I am from Husayn. Allah loves he who loves Husayn. Husayn is an offspring (sibt) among the offsprings (asbat of the prophets).”
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385. al-Manaqib, by Ibn Shahr Ashub narrates from ‘Abdullah ibn Shaybah, from his father who said:“The Prophet (s.a.w.) was called to prayer while Hasan was clinging onto him, so the Prophet (s.a.w.) put him down in front of him and prayed. When prostrating he prolonged the prostration. From among people, I raised my head and I saw Hasan (a.s.) on the shoulder of the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.). When he concluded his prayers, people told him: “O Messenger of Allah! You performed a prostration in your prayer that you do not usually perform, like as if a revelation was descending unto you.”
He (s.a.w.) said:“There was no revelation, but my son was on my shoulder, and I did not want to hasten until he himself would come down.”
And in the narration by ‘Abdullah ibn Shaddad it is said that the Prophet (s.a.w.) said:“My son mounted on my shoulder, and I did not like to put him down hastily until he finished what he was doing.”
رُخصَةُ اللَّعِبِ لِلصَّبِيِ
377. الإمام الصادق عليه السلام: دَع ابنَكَ يَلعَبُ سَبعَ سِنينَ، ويُؤَدَّبُ سَبعَ سِنينَ، وألزِمهُ نَفسَكَ سَبعَ سِنينَ، فإن أفلَحَ، وإلّا فَإنّهُ مِمَّن لا خَيرَ فيهِ
378. الإمام زين العابدين عليه السلام: قالَ النَّبِيُ صلى الله عليه وآله لَهُما [لِلحَسَنِ وَالحُسَينِ عليهما السلام]: قُوما الآنَ فاصطَرعا، فَقاما لِيَصطَرِعا، وقَد خَرَجَت فاطِمَةُ عليها السلام في بَعضِ حاجَتِها، فَدَخَلَت فَسَمِعَتِ النَّبِيَ صلى الله عليه وآله وهُوَ يَقولُ: إيهِ يا حَسَنُ! شُدَّ عَلَى الحُسَينِ فَاصرَعهُ
فَقالَت لَهُ: يا أبَه، واعَجَباهُ! أتُشَجِّعُ هذا عَلى هذا، أتُشَجِّعُ الكَبيرَ عَلَى الصَّغيرِ؟ !
فَقالَ لَها: يا بُنَيَّةُ، أما تَرضَينَ أن أَقولَ أنا: يا حَسَنُ، شُدَّ عَلَى الحُسَينِ فَاصرَعهُ، وهذا حَبيبي جَبرَئيلُ يَقولُ: يا حُسَينُ، شُدَّ عَلَى الحَسَنِ فَاصرَعهُ؟
379. المعجم الكبير عن أبي أيّوب الأنصاريّ: دَخَلتُ عَلى رَسولِ الله صلى الله عليه وآله وَالحَسَنُ وَالحُسَينُ عليهما السلام يَلعَبانِ بَينَ يَدَيهِ وفي حِجرِهِ، فَقُلتُ: يا رَسولَ اللهِ أتُحِبُّهُما؟ قالَ: وكَيفَ لا أُحِبُّهُما وهُما رَيحانَتايَ مِنَ الدُّنيا أشَمُّهما !
380. المعجم الكبير عن أبي سعيد: جاءَ الحُسَينُ عليه السلام ورَسولُ الله صلى الله عليه وآله يُصَلّي، فَالتَزَمَ عُنُقَ النَّبِيّ صلى الله عليه وآله، فَقامَ بِهِ وأخَذَ بِيَدِهِ، فَلَم يَزَل مُمسِكَها حَتّى رَكَعَ
381. شرح الأخبار عن جعفر بن فروي بإسناده: أنّ رَسولَ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله كانَ جالِساً مَعَ أصحابِهِ، إذ أقبَلَ إلَيهِ الحَسَنُ وَالحُسَينُ عليهما السلام وَهُما صَغيرانِ، فَجَعَلا يَنزُوانِ عَلَيهِ، فَمَرَّةً يَضَعُ لَهُما رَأسَهُ، ومَرَّةً يَأخُذُهُما إلَيهِ، فَقَبَّلَهُما، ورَجُلٌ مِن جُلَسائِهِ يَنظُرُ إلَيهِ كَالمُتَعَجِّبِ مِن ذلِكَ، ثُمَّ قالَ: يا رَسولَ اللهِ، ما أعلَمُ أنِّي قَبَّلتُ وَلَدا إلَيّ قَطُّ !
فَغَضِبَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله حَتَّى التَمَعَ لَونُهُ، فَقالَ لِلرَّجُلِ: إن كانَ اللهُ قَد نَزَعَ الرَّحمَةَ مِن قَلبِكَ فَما أصنَعُ بِكَ؟ مَن لَم يَرحَم صَغيرَنا ويُعَزِّز كَبيرَنا فَلَيسَ مِنَّا
382. سنن النسائي عن عبد الله بن شدّاد عن أبيه: خَرَجَ عَلَينا رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله في إحدى صَلاتَي العِشاءِ وهُوَ حامِلٌ حَسَناً أو حُسَيناً، فَتَقَدَّمَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله فَوَضَعَهُ، ثُمَّ كَبَّرَ لِلصَّلاةِ فَصَلّى، فَسَجَدَ بَينَ ظَهرانَي صَلاتِهِ سَجدَةً أطالَها، قالَ أبي: رَفَعتُ رَأسي وإذا الصَّبِيّ عَلى ظَهرِ رَسولِ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله وهُوَ ساجِدٌ، فَرَجَعتُ إلى سُجودِي. فَلَمّا قَضى رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله الصَّلاةَ، قالَ النّاسُ: يا رَسولَ اللهِ، إنَّكَ سَجَدتَ بَينَ ظَهرانَي صَلاتِكَ سَجدَةً أطَلتَها حَتّى ظَنَنَّا قَد أنَّهُ حَدَثَ أمرٌ أو أنَّهُ يُوحى إلَيكَ
قالَ: كُلُّ ذلِكَ لَم يَكُن، ولكِنَّ ابني ارتَحَلَني فَكَرِهتُ أن اعجِلَهُ حَتّى يَقضِيَ حاجَتَهُ
383. المناقب لابن شهر آشوب عن الليث بن سعد: أنَّ النَّبِيَّ صلى الله عليه وآله كانَ يُصَلّي يَوماً في فِئَةٍ وَالحُسَينُ عليه السلام صَغِيرٌ بِالقُربِ مِنهُ، وكانَ النَّبِيّ إذا سَجَدَ جاءَ الحُسَينُ عليه السلام فَرَكِبَ ظَهرَهُ ثُمَّ حَرَّكَ رِجلَيهِ، وقالَ: حِل حِل
وإذا أرادَ رَسولُ اللهِ أن يَرفَعَ رَأسَهُ أخَذَهُ فَوَضَعَهُ إلى جانِبِهِ، فَإذا سَجَدَ عادَ عَلى ظَهرِهِ، وقالَ: حِل حِل، فَلَم يَزَل يَفعَلُ ذلِكَ حَتّى فَرَغَ النَّبِيّ مِن صَلاتِهِ
فَقالَ يَهودِيٌ: يا مُحَمَّدُ، إنَّكُم لَتَفعَلونَ بِالصِّبيانِ شَيئاً ما نَفعَلُهُ نَحنُ !
فَقالَ النَّبِيّ صلى الله عليه وآله: أما لَو كُنتُم تُؤمِنونَ بِاللهِ وبِرَسولِهِ لَرَحِمتُمُ الصِّبيانَ
قالَ: فَإنِّي اؤمِنُ بِاللهِ وبِرَسُولِهِ. فَأَسلَمَ لَمّا رَأى كَرَمَهُ مِن عِظَمِ قَدرِهِ
384. المستدرك على الصحيحينَ عن يعلى العامري: أنَّهُ خَرَجَ مَعَ رَسولِ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله إلى طَعامٍ دُعوا لَهُ، قالَ: فَاستَقبَلَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله أمامَ القَومِ وحُسَينٌ مَعَ الغِلمانِ يَلعَبُ، فَأرادَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله أن يَأخُذَهُ، فَطَفِقَ الصَّبِيُ يَفِرُّ هاهُنا مَرَّةً وَهاهُنا مَرَّةً، فَجَعَلَ رَسولُ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله يُضاحِكُهُ حَتّى أخَذَهُ
فَقالَ: حُسَينٌ مِنِّي وأنا مِن حُسَينٍ، أحَبَّ اللهُ مَن أحَبَّ حُسَينا، حُسَينٌ سِبطٌ مِنَ الأسباطِ
385. المناقب لابن شهر آشوب عن عبد الله بن شيبة عن أبيه: أنَّهُ دُعِيَ النَّبِيُّ صلى الله عليه وآله إلى صَلاةٍ وَالحَسَنُ مُتَعَلِّقٌ بِهِ، فَوَضَعَهُ النَّبِيُ صلى الله عليه وآله مُقابِلَ جَنبِهِ وصَلّى، فَلَمّا سَجَدَ أطالَ السُّجودَ، فَرَفَعتُ رَأسي مِن بَينِ القَومِ فَاذا الحَسَنُ عَلى كَتِفِ رَسولِ اللهِ صلى الله عليه وآله، فَلَمّا سَلَّم قالَ لَهُ القَومُ: يا رَسولَ اللهِ لَقَد سَجَدتَ في صَلاتِكَ هذِهِ سَجدَةً ما كُنتَ تَسجُدُها، كَأنَّما يوحى إلَيكَ !
فَقالَ [صلى الله عليه وآله]: لَم يُوحَ إلَيّ، ولكنَّ ابني كانَ عَلَى كَتِفي فَكَرِهتُ أن اعجِلَهُ حَتّى نَزَلَ
وفي رِوايَةِ عَبدِ اللهِ بنِ شَدّادٍ أنَّهُ صلى الله عليه وآله قَالَ: إنَّ ابنِي هذَا ارتَحَلَني فَكَرِهتُ أن اعجِلَهُ حَتّى يَقضِيَ حاجَتَهُ. قالَ: فَوَضَعَ إحدى يَدَيهِ تَحتَ قَفاهُ، وَالاخرى تَحتَ ذَقَنِهِ، فَوَضَعَ فاهُ عَلى فيهِ يُقَبِّلُهُ
5.4: Acting in a Childish Manner for Children And Playing with Them
386. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said:“He who has a child must treat him in a childish manner.”
387. Imam ‘Ali (a.s.) said:“He who has a child he must act as a child [with him].”
388. Kanz al-Ummal, narrating from ÞAnas, who said:“The Messenger of Allah was playing with Zainab bint Um Salamah [his step-daughter] and he repeatedly said: “O little Zainab! O little Zainab.”
389. Sunan ibn Majah, narrating from Sa’id ibn Abu Rashid who said:“Ya’la ibn Marrah narrated to them that they went out with the Prophet (s.a.w.) to a feast they were invited to. On their way, they saw Husayn (a.s.) playing in the alley.
The Prophet (s.a.w.) went ahead of the group and stretched out his hands, but the boy [Husayn] (a.s.) started running around, so the Prophet (s.a.w.) made him laugh until he took him.
He (s.a.w.) put one of his hands under his chin and the other hand on the back of his head, and then kissed him.
He (s.a.w.) then said: “Husayn is from me and I am from Husayn. Allah loves he who loves Husayn. Husayn is an offspring (sibt) of the offsprings (asbat of the prophets).”
390. Sahih ibn Habban, narrating from Abu Hurayrah who said:“The Prophet (s.a.w.) would stick out his tongue for Husayn who when seeing the reddish tip of the tongue he would laugh. Then ‘Uyayna ibn Badr asked him: “What do I see and why does he do this for him? I have a son whose beard has grown out, but I have never kissed him.”
The Prophet (s.a.w.) said:“He who does not show mercy will not be shown mercy.”
391. al-Manaqib, narrating from Ibn Shahr Ashub who narrated from Ibn Mahad from his father who said:“The Prophet (s.a.w.) once knelt down for Hasan and Husayn and let them mount and set their hands and legs opposite each other
and he would say: “Your camel is a good camel.”
392. Fada’il al-Sahabah, narrating from Abu Hurayrah who said:“I saw the Prophet (s.a.w.) holding the hands of Husayn ibn ‘Ali and was putting his feet on his own feet and saying: “Come up, O small eyed! Come up, O small eyed!”
393. Kifayah al-Athar, narrating from Abu Hurayrah who said:“I along with Abu Bakr, ‘Umar, Fadl ibn ‘Abbas, Zaid ibn Harithah and ‘Abdullah ibn Mas’ud were with the Prophet (s.a.w.) when Husayn ibn ‘Ali (a.s.) entered and the Prophet (s.a.w.) took him and kissed him, and then said: “O little. O little! Come up, O small eyed!”
He (s.a.w.) then put his mouth on Husayn’s mouth and said:“O Allah! I love him. So love him and love those who love him.”
التَّصابي لِلصَّبِيِّ وَاللَّعِبُ مَعَهُ
386. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: مَن كانَ عِندَهُ صَبِيّ فَليَتَصابَ لَهُ
387. الإمام عليّ عليه السلام: مَن كانَ لَهُ وَلَدٌ صَبا
388. كنز العمّال عن أنس: كانَ [رَسولُ الله صلى الله عليه وآله] يُلاعِبُ زَينَبَ بِنتَ امِّ سَلَمَةَ ويَقولُ: يا زُوَينِبُ، يا زُوَينِبُ مِرارا
389. سنن ابن ماجة عن سعيد بن أبي راشد: أنَّ يَعلَى بنَ مُرَّةَ حَدَّثَهُم أنَّهُم خَرَجوا مَعَ النَّبِيّ صلى الله عليه وآله إلى طَعامٍ دُعوا لَهُ، فَإذا حُسَينٌ يَلعَبُ فِي السِّكَّةِ ، قالَ: فَتَقَدَّمَ النَّبِيُ صلى الله عليه وآله أمامَ القَومِ وبَسَطَ يَدَيهِ، فَجَعَلَ الغُلامُ يَفِرُّ هاهُنا وهاهُنا، ويُضاحِكُهُ النَّبِيُ صلى الله عليه وآله حَتّى أخَذَهُ، فَجَعَلَ إحدى يَدَيهِ تَحتَ ذَقَنِهِ، وَالاخرى في فَأسِ رَأسِهِ، فَقَبَّلَهُ وقالَ: حُسَينٌ مِنِّي وأنا مِن حُسَينٍ، أحَبَّ اللهُ مَنْ أحَبَّ حُسَيناً، حُسَينٌ سِبطٌ مِنَ الأَسباطِ
390. صحيح ابن حبّان عن أبي هريرة: كانَ النَّبِيّ صلى الله عليه وآله يَدلَعُ لِسانَهُ لِلحُسَينِ، فَيَرى الصَّبِيّ حُمرَةَ لِسانِهِ، فَقالَ النَّبِيُ صلى الله عليه وآله: مَن لا يَرحَمُ لا يُرحَمُ
391. المناقب لابن شهرآشوب عن ابن مهاد عن أبيه: [أنَ] النَّبِيَّ صلى الله عليه وآله بَرَكَ لِلحَسَنِ وَالحُسَينِ فَحَمَلَهُما وخالَفَ بَينَ أيديهِما وأرجُلِهِما، وقالَ: نِعمَ الجَمَلُ جَمَلُكُما
392. فضائل الصحابة عن أبي هريرة: رَأيتُ النَّبِيَّ صلى الله عليه وآله وقَد أخَذَ بِيَدَي الحُسَينِ بنِ عَلِيّ، وقَد وَضَعَ قَدَمَ الحُسَينِ عَلى ظَهرِ قَدَمَيهِ، وهُوَ يَقولُ: تَرَقَّ عَينَ بَقَّه ، تَرَقَّ عَينَ بَقَّه
393. كفاية الأثر عن أبي هريرة: كُنتُ عِندَ النَّبِيَّ صلى الله عليه وآله وأبو بَكرٍ وعُمَرُ وَالفَضلُ بنُ العَبّاسِ وزَيدُ بنُ حارِثَةَ وعَبدُ اللهِ بنُ مَسعودٍ، إذ دَخَلَ الحُسَينُ بنُ عَلِيّ عليه السلام، فَأَخَذَهُ النَّبِيُ صلى الله عليه وآله وقَبَّلَهُ، ثُمَّ قالَ: حِبِقَّةٌ حِبِقَّه، تَرقَّ عَينَ بَقَّه ، ووَضَعَ فَمَهُ عَلى فَمِهِ، ثُمَّ قالَ: اللّهُمَّ إنّي احِبُّهُ فَأحِبَّهُ، وأحِبَّ مَن يُحِبُّهُ
5.5: The Children’s Entertainment Place
394. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said:“Indeed, soil is the child’s place of entertainment.”
395. The Prophet (s.a.w.) said:“I love children for five things: first: they cry a lot; second: they play with soil; third: they hate without malice; fourth: they do not store anything for the next day; fifth: they build something and then they ruin it.”
رَبيعُ الصِّبيانِ
394. رسول الله صلى الله عليه وآله: إنَّ التُّرابَ رَبيعُ الصِّبيانِ
395. عنه صلى الله عليه وآله: احِبُّ الصِّبيانَ لِخَمسٍ: الأوَّلُ: أنَّهُم هُمُ البَكَّاؤونَ، وَالثّاني: يَتَمرَّغونَ بِالتُّرابِ، وَالثّالِثُ: يَختَصِمونَ مِن غَيرِ حِقدٍ، وَالرّابِعُ: لا يَدَّخِرونَ لِغَدٍ شَيئا، وَالخامِسُ: يُعَمِّرونَ ثُمَّ يُخَرِّبونَ
The Function of Playing in the Growth of a Child
Playing is the most serious subject in the life of a child. The term ‘playing’ for adults is equal to pass-time, vanity, negligence and so on, and they are things that only hinder advancement and progress, but as for a child, it is the cause of his growth and development. The child’s period of playing is not a period of the ceasing of progress, but it is a period of flourishing of talents through playing. This is why it has been recommended that you let your children play, and children who are playful will be clever and patient when they become adults.
The second tradition refers to the fundamental function playing has in the growth and elevation of one’s personality. A child who has not satiated his childhood in playing will show some childish behaviour when he grows up, and having such characteristics is an abnormal conduct some people are inflicted with in their adolescent and adult age. One of the causes of this abnormality is a child not fulfilling his natural needs, and this need is achieved only through acting like a child and playing.
The Importance of Playing from a Psychological Viewpoint
Any healthy and useful game a child engages in has many important benefits that can be easily seen in the psychological growth of the child’s personality.
1- The Physical Importance
The playing along with activities for the growth of the child’s muscles and giving exercises to different parts of the body is of high importance and value. These kinds of activities can also be useful for letting out the additional energy of the child. If the additional energy is not used in a correct way and it is stored unsatisfied in the child’s body, it makes him uneasy, nervous and bad tempered.
2- The Psychological Importance
Playing gives a child a chance to express his feelings. He can bring out his pressed energy by means of play. A child can express his feelings through fear, annoyance, anxiety, happiness and so on in the frame of his desired personalities however he likes and he can also let out his negative energy and inner hate.
3-The Upbringing Importance
It is by playing that the true personality of children takes it shape, and considerable changes happen in their spirit all of which are a passage to the higher stage of growth. Playing will provide a kind of development for the children, and it is here that the opportunities and facilities in upbringing are made manifest and certain.
4-The Social Importance
In playing a child learns how to socially communicate with others who are outside his family unit and learns how to solve the problems and difficulties emerging from these kind of communications, and he also learns how to socially adapt with others.
5-The Educational Importance
By means of playing with different kinds of toys a child can succeed to learn and recognize colours, shapes, sizes, materials, different kinds of things and their importance. Playing helps a child recognize the world in which he lives in, and also to comprehend, touch, feel, and manage things. It also helps him to differentiate between reality and delusion.
6-The Moral Importance
In the period of playing, a child learns what is good and what is bad! The child finds out that if he desires to be counted as an acceptable person in an activity he must be truthful, trustworthy, fair, disciplined, truth seeking, honest, independent and so on.
A Psychological Analysis of Playing
Different theories have been given by psychologists in regards to analysing and explaining the role of playing in children. Some of these theories are: The theory of extra power, the theory of removing tension, the theory of evolving renewal; and the theory of pre-exercise.
A- The Theory of Extra Power
According to this theory, when the energy of the body increases more than its normal level as seen in playing, their bodily organs feel extra powerful. This theory cannot justify the motionless and hidden playing of children that do not need any physical activity.
B- The Theory of Removing Tension
This theory that says playing returns back the consumed power, means a person’s body will get tired after working and doing activities, and it needs a kind of practice by which the tension can be removed, which is to play. Therefore, the need to play appears when the bodily power has reached its lowest level, and not when it has extra energy. This theory which has been offered by Schaller and Muris Lazarus does not identify the playing that is done after the full resting of a child.
C- The Theory of Evolving Renewal
Based on this theory that has been suggested by S. Hall, children renew the scenes and activities of their ancestors that were produced due to the need of their life in their plays. For example, in certain playing fishing, boating, hunting and the like, the child repeats the outline of the life of his ancestors who were cave dwellers.
D- The Attitude of Pre-exercise
Basing upon this theory which was given by K. Groos, playing is considered as a kind of preparation in a child for his future activities. According to this view, the content of playing is formed by activities that the child must have in the maturity period and adult age.
Although this theory points to the function of playing in the socializing of a child that was not mentioned in the former theories, but it can not yet define all the childish playing, like imitating animals.
The Age of Playing
Another issue is the age of playing. Some traditions indicate that a child must be allowed to play until he is seven years old. Does this mean that after this age he should not be allowed to play? In narrations the first seven years is counted as the period of playing, and the second seven years is the period of disciplining. Accordingly, it mostly emphasizes that during the first seven years disciplining should not be performed. Of course, there is no doubt that the narration indicates that the first seven years is specifically for playing and in this age the child must be left to play. But is playing forbidden during this period? Or is it that playing is reproached during this time, and even though disciplining is done but playing is allowed according to the age and any certain conditions.
It seems that the second state is more fitting, meaning that in the second seven years disciplining begins, but according to a child’s conditions he can also play. Of course, this playing is not general and without limitations (like the first seven years), and as it is in the period of disciplining it must have some limitations. This matter can be studied more in psychological researches.
The Parents Playing with the Child
Besides giving permission to play, the parents’ themselves playing with the child is itself another important factor. On one side, playing is an important pillar of the child’s life, and on the other side, parents are a part of child’s life and they have a particular position for them. This is why it is very important for the child that his parents enter into his world. It is here that playing with child takes its importance. Since parents are the most important persons for the child, playing with him causes honour for the child and elevation of his self esteem. It produces the feeling of self-worthiness and self-motivation. It also strengthens the relationship of the child with the parents, and it has a fundamental function in the loyalty and sincerity of their relationship, being one of the necessary features in the parent - child relationship.
Buying various toys which are sophisticated and expensive does not bring about a child’s consent in his relationship with his parents. He only wishes that his parents understand him and his world and participate in it.
On this basis, there are two issues that can be seen in the teachings of religion. One is the parents playing with children (which had been abundantly seen in the conduct of the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.)), and the other is that parents should play with their children like a child. Adults’ playing their own way is not pleasant and satisfying for the child, but it is childish playing that satisfies the child and develops his personality and teaches him the skills of life. This is why the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) played childishly with children.
The important point is that adults’ playing with children is not vain and amusement, but it is a wise, mature, and intellectual practise and it does not decrease their honour.
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Author: M. Mohammadi Rayshahri
