Alhassanain(p) Network for Heritage and Islamic Thought

9. Maintenance and its Philosophy

According to legal system of Islam, the expenditure of the family is carried by the husband. It is the duty of man to pay the expenses of the wife, even if she is wealthier than him. It is incumbent to bear the Maintenance, which is one of the commands of Islam. Maintenance is the right of the wife. If the man does not pay it, it will be like a loan and remain on him, and at the time of demand he should pay it. Even if he refuses to pay the Maintenance, the Islamic authority and the
religious judge can give divorce to that woman (upon her request).

Imam MuhammadBaqir (a.s .) said:

“ Whoever has a wife but does not pay for food and clothes, the Imam has the right to separate them.”[99]

Is’haq Ibn Ammar says, “ I asked ImamSadiq (a.s .) what is the right of woman over her husband?”

He replied: Food and clothes and to forgive her errors.[100]

Maintenance refers to all the requirements of the family, with regards to the level standard of the society of that time and place, and according to the status of the family, such as:

Food, fruits, and other things according to necessity, and social status.

Carpet and bed.

Summer and winter clothes, according to necessity and their standard level.

Utensils and necessary things for cooking, eating, and drinking;

Air conditioner.

House, owned or rented, according to their standard level, and suitable to give them comfort.

Expense of health and medicine.

The costs of cleanliness and make-up.

And other requirements.

An objection and its reply

The topic of Maintenance has come under criticism, and it is said that by this system the woman is insulted and treated as a rented worker who gets food and clothes for her day and night hard works.

Answer: The above objection is due to misinformation and in view of those who raise this objection the responsibility of housework is on the woman. She also has to look after the children, take care of them and suckle them. However, the fact is that she is free to reject any home work and may ask for a servant. She may also ask for the wage for the housework she does; that is to look after the children or to suckle them. Again her Maintenance is the responsibility of man.

By paying attention to the above points, how can it be said that it is an insult to woman, and she is counted as a servant?

Another question

While the husband and wife need each other for satisfying their sexual desires and procreation, why is the family expenditure the responsibility of the man alone? Why only the man has to work and the woman gets food, clothes, and sleeps, and doesno work in the house? Is not it injustice on man? Why should the expenses of the woman be on the husband, and he should obey her orders? Wouldn’t it be better if both, husband andwife, work and bear the expenses of the household together?

In reply we point out some important things:

Nature has kept heavy responsibilities on woman, that she has to perform, i.e. pregnancy, delivery, breast-feeding, to look after and train the children. To accomplish these responsibilities she requires time, which is not possible if she works out of the house and also not suitable to her.

Every month women have periods for some days, and during these days they require rest.

Although housework and children are not lawful responsibility of the woman, but ethically and according to practice she cannot disregard them. Since it is the necessity of life and family, and contributes to the beautification of house and attracting the husband.

Woman is a soft, lofty, and beautiful creature, and the best way of endearing herself to the husband is her softness and beauty. If she works out, the difficult and tiring job affects her softness, beauty, and her attraction. Her attractiveness to the husband decreases, which is neither to her benefit nor that of her husband. If it is decided that woman works like man for the expenditure of house and expenses of life, in choosing a profession like man, sometimes she has to work in the coal and iron mines, automobile industry, petrochemicals, cement, petroleum factories, road, transport action, railway, and driving of heavy trucks, and the tiring night jobs.

Therefore, if men and women would have to work together for maintaining the life equally, they naturally would face such problems. Thus women cannot be made to work like men and pay the expenses of life.

Due to this, and to support the woman, Islamic legal system has put the responsibility of managing the house on the husband, so that wife, with comfort and time, performs those duties, which the nature has kept on her. She must look after the children, protect her beauty and happiness, and preserve her position in the heart of her husband, and considers the house as a source of comfort and friendship.

In this situation, man with comfortable mind and interest at wife and children, and getting peace in life, works harder and bears the expenses of the house.

On this basis, Islam by knowing the realities and observing the well-being of husband, wife, and children, and to stabilize the marital life, has made expenses of the family a responsibility of man and it has not been a partial decision.

The well being of woman and man necessitate that Maintenance be on the man, and woman be depended on him. Since man is in live with the woman, it is necessary that he pays for her and this is not improper. He also gets a sense of personality. The economical dependence of woman is not harmful to her, and does not make her a domestic who just eats the ration. Rather it helps the base of marriage. Generally, the income of husband belongs to the family, and he pays for the expenses, and it does not affect the economic independence of the wife.

At the end, it is important to remind that the aim of Islam by establishment of Maintenance was not that the wife sits idle at home, and just eats and wears without taking any responsibility and work out of home. She can, by observing her capacity and interest, and her facility and by mutual understanding with her husband, choose a suitable profession and perform her duty and in this way she can earn income. Her income belongs to her only, and she is not forced to share it. But a good wife, according to her sincerity presents her income to the family members, so that she can be a partner in managing the house and for making life more comfortable, and this increases the love and kindness of the family.

Think and Answer

1. Who is responsible for home expenses?

2. What are compulsory expenses?

3. Has the compulsion of Maintenance on the husband humiliated the wife? Why?

4. Why is the Maintenance of the wife a responsibility of husband?

5. Is the compulsion of bearing Maintenance by the husband an injustice? Why?

10. The Inheritance of Woman in Islamic Jurisprudence

Man and woman, from the Islamic viewpoint have the same rights. They have the right to work, earn money, own property, and are originally common in inheritance. Husband and wife inherit each other.

The Qur’an says:

Men shall have a portion of whatever parents and near relatives leave, while women should have a portion of whatever parents and near relatives leave; no matter how small nor how large it is, a portion is stipulated.[101]

It is said in the above verse that women like men, have the right to inherit and have a certain portion.

The verses of inheritance were revealed when women in the world, especially among the ignorant Arabs, did not have any value or status. The ignorant men were ashamed of a daughter, and in some tribes they used to bury her alive.

At that time the inheritance reached only the sons or the eldest son, and daughters were deprived of it. Except for the things, which the father had willed for the daughter; or the brother in sympathy would had given it to his sister. Because of this when the verse on inheritance was revealed, as fixed a portion for women in inheritance, many people were astonished.

Fakhruddin Razi has written on the revelation of this verse: “Ibn Abbas narrated that Aus binThabit Ansari died, leaving three daughters and a wife. Two of his paternal cousins,Suraid andArfajah , came and took away all the wealth. The wife of Aus came to the holy Prophet (s.a.w.a .), and told her story and said that ‘the executors did not give anything to my daughters and me.” The holy Prophet (s.a.w.a .) said:

“ Go back home so that I see what command comes from Allah.”

After that the above verse was revealed, which shows that both, man and woman, receive inheritance and that both of them inherit each other.[102]

In such a period Islam conferred inheritance to the woman, and gave her individuality, and considered her equal to man. But in Islamic legislation, the portion of woman’s inheritance is half of that of man’s.

The Qur’an says:

Allah instructs you, concerning your children: a son shall have a share to that of two daughters. If the women are more than two, then they shall have two thirds of what the deceased has left; and if there is only one, she has half. And for his parents, each of them shall receivea sixth of what he has left if he has a child. But if he has nochild, and (only) his two parents inherit him, then his mother will receive a third. But if he has siblings, then his mother will have a sixth, once his will or his any dept has been settled. You do not know whether your parents or your children, are closer to you in usefulness. This is an ordinance from Allah; Surely Allahis Knowing , Wise.[103]

From the viewpoint of Islam, the son gets double of that of a daughter, and the brother gets double of the sister. The husband inherits two times that of the wife’s. But in case of mother and father, if at the time of death of their children they are alive, each one of them will get one sixth of the dead person’s wealth.

An objection to the law of inheritance is: the discrimination between the portions of the woman and man. Who is the woman’s half of that of man’s? Is not it injustice and discrimination?

The question of the share of man and woman, and the difference between them, and all the rules related to them should not be separated. It is true that Islam has considered difference in inheritance between woman and man. But this difference is due to the facts and economical responsibility, which is on man. In Islamic law, man should give dowry to his wife. All the expenses of family are kept also on him. For this reason, man should work hard and bear all the expenses. But for the woman, it is not necessary to work and bear any expenses; also if she has wealth she is not forced to spend it. She can save it for herself. Wealth, which comes to her by work, business, dowry, gift, inheritance, or any other legal way belongs to her alone, and she can save it all.

On the other hand, man is obliged to pay, along with dowry, all the expenses of the family members.

Thus the wife is a partner in the husband’s wealth, and whatever comes to her from inheritance is hers’ alone, which she can save. That is why Islam decided to make a balance and help man bylegislating the law of inheritance.

By attention to the above, can we say that woman has been discriminated in inheritance? You can verify that not only there is no discrimination against woman, but also that is in her favor. The traditions also mention these reasons:

Imam Reza (a.s .) said:

“ The reason that the inheritance of woman is half of that of man’s is because, the girl when she marries and has a husband takes from him; but it is the duty of man to give; and due to this the inheritance of man is more. Another reason is that the woman being awife, is entitled to get her maintenance from the husband. But it is not incumbent on her to bear the expenses of the husband and help him at the time of necessity. Due to this, the inheritance of man is more. And Allah says regarding this:Men are the maintainers of women because Allah has made some of them to excelothers, and because they spend out of their property…” [104]

Hisham binSâlem narrated thatIbn Abil Awja said toAhwal , why is inheritance of the weak woman one portion, but a wealthy man takes two third?

Hisham asked the same question from ImamSadiq (a.s .). He answered: “On women, is not payment for Maintenance, war, and other responsibilities. But all these things are incumbent upon man. And due to this in inheritance man takes two third and woman takes one part. “ [105]

Think and Answer

1. What were the circumstances and conditions, at the time of the revelation of the verse of inheritance?

2. What is the share of women in inheritance according to Islamic rules?

3. Why is the portion of woman half of the man’s?

4. Is the law of inheritance an injustice against the women?

11. Islam and Polygamy

Islam accepted polygamy, and allows man to take more than one wife under special circumstances, and the maximum limit is four wives.

Islam has not brought something new. Before that, polygamy was common in Eastern countries. Although Islam has not disallowed it, but for the well-being has put some conditions, and limited it to four wives, but the actual law for polygamy is legislated.

Islam in allowing polygamy, did not intend to be partial to man, and did not encourage them in lustful marriages. It has not taken away the rights of women blindly, and has not done injustice on them. Rather the aim of Islam is to defend the natural rights of women; thatis the rights of marriage, having a family, giving birth to legitimate children, and train them.

In some circumstances protecting the rights of men was the intention also. On this basis, controlled and limited polygamy is one of the necessities of every society, and it is actually for the well being of both women and men. Two points are explained regarding this:

(1) The rate of female birthsexceed that of the male, and statistics shows that the number of girls and women of the marriage age are always more than men. This difference is due to two reasons:

A) The death rate of men, particularly young men is usually higher than that of young girls. If we see the figures of the dead ones, due to accident, wars, plane-crashes, drowning, death of workers in mines, factories, and driving accidents, etc, we will find that men are mostly involved. Thus, their death rate is higher. So, the number of females is more than males. For confirmation, look at casualties in the last wars. Like Iraq-Iran war, American attack on Iraq, war of Afghanistan with Russia, the internal wars between them, the Yugoslavian war, and other wars in different parts of the world. In terms of human casualties, these wars are very much frightening. And most of the killed were men and young men, who were unmarried or newly married. Now calculate the effect of these wars. How much it contributed to the increase in number of women over men?

B) Some scholars claim that women have more immunity against diseases than men. Analyzing the figures of death of infants and youth certify this view. The average life span of women is more than that of men. Figures show that there are more widows than widowers.

On this basis, the number of unmarried widows is more than unmarried men. We see many widows willing to marry but they do not see the chance. But we find many few men who are interested in marrying.

(2) One of the natural rights of human beings is to marry and have a family. Every human being, male or female, has the right to marry and feel the comfort and love of the family, giving birth to legal children, and train them. Woman is also a human being who wants these things and has the right over them. Therefore, the rules of the society should be so prepared that everyone could enjoy this right.

In short, in every society, widows are present in large numbers who need to marry, and have a desire for it. And if they don’t marry, they may go towards immorality. On the other hand, the number of unmarried men is not so high, who could marry these widows, because most prefer to marry a virgin girl who are present in large numbers. Then what could the widows, who need to marry, do? And what is the solution of this problem? Should we allow unlimited immorality and free sex contact, or allow polygamy as Islam has accepted it?

For solving this problem, and enjoy of the widows, who desire to marry and have a family, and to prevent immorality and sexual promiscuity in the society, Islam has permitted polygamy.

Other case of allowance of polygamy is when the wife is ill or barren. In case the wife is barren or has an incurable illness, or bearing the child or becoming mother is painful for her, while the husband requires children, reason and wisdom give permission to him to take additional wife.

In this way, when the woman is ill and cannot fulfill the sexual desires of her husband, it would be a justification for him to seek another wife.

For solving this problem he can either divorce the first wife, or keep her, and at the same time chooses another wife.Although choosing the second wife is beneficial to women.

At the end, a necessary reminder is that the important benefit of marriage is friendship, comfort and love in the family. For this, monogamy is better than polygamy. Islam also does not encourage that a person should practice polygamy for sexual enjoyment and sacrifice friendship and comfort of the family for short time pleasures. It has allowed polygamy as a social need, and for the sake of supporting the rights of widows who need a husband.

The general social circumstances, and status and resources of the person have differences in this point. If there is no personal or social need, one wife is better than many wives. And in case where multiple wives are the necessity of the society or related to a person or necessary for some special persons, then the husband and wife should co-operate in maintaining this need.One who intends to remarry, should first study his economic and physical conditions. If he doesn’t have the resources for managing two families, then he should avoid it. After that, he should discuss with his wife and tell her about his second marriage. He should assure her of justice and equality between the two wives, and by every possible means, gains her acceptance.

His wife too, by considering his personal or social needs, should allow him and co-operate with him. She must refrain from anger and sentimentality. She must try to understand the problems and needs of her husband, and the widows. Above all, she should be pleased of Allah’s satisfaction, and support her husband’s legal desires. If the second marriage takes place with the mutual understanding of husband and wife, there would be no problem.

Pre-conditions of Polygamy

Although Islam has allowed polygamy, there are some conditions, that practically its establishment would be very difficult.

Economic resources for maintaining two families.

Physical strength for fulfillment of sexual desires of two wives.

Observing justice between two families from all respects, without any discrimination.

The Qur’an says:

“ Then marry women as may seem good to you, two or three or four; but if you fear that you will not act justly, then marry only one. “[106]

In the above verse, the permission for polygamy is on the condition that it should be without any risk of injustice and inequality, which is practically very difficult.

Aman who has more than one wife, has to provide the same type and measure of food, behavior, sexuality, and even the ethical behavior between them. He should be equal and just. Although there may be differences of age beauty, ethical, or social status in wives, but it is the duty of man that he should behave similarly with all of them.

Thus, it is clear that observing justice is a difficult task, and very few men will be able to perform their duties. In this case the Qur’an says that if you fear that you could not behave just between your wives, then one wife would be enough for you. On this basis, next marriage is a difficult case and carries much responsibility, and everyone is not competent for it.

Think and Answer

1. Why Islam has allowed polygamy?

2. Why Islam has defended the right of widows to remarry?

3. Why did Islam allow polygamy?

4. What would have happened if Islam had not allowed polygamy?

5. What are the requirements for polygamy?

6. What steps should the man take if he intends for a second marriage?

7. If there is a need for a second wife, what is the duty of the first wife?

12. Divorce in Islamic law

Although Islam has allowed separation of husband and wife in special conditions, it is an act disliked by Allah, and traditions of the innocent leaders also have not praised it. For example: ImamSadiq (a.s .) said:

“ Allah likes the house where marriage takes place and dislikes the house where divorce occurs. The most detestable thing to Allah is divorce. “[107]

Or,

“ In all the actions, which arehalaal (permissible), there is noth ing worse than divorce. Allah does not like that a person commits divorces and takes many wives. “[108]

ImamSadiq (a.s .) said:

“ When news reached to the holy Prophet (s.a.w.a .) that AbuAyyub had the intention to divorce his wife, he said that it was a sin to divorce the mother ofAyyub . “[109]

Imam MuhammadBaqir (a.s .) narrated from the holy Prophet (s.a.w.a .) that he said:

“Jibrael recommended me about the wife as much as I thought divorcing her would be illegal, except in case she openly commits an indecent act.”[110]

Again ImamSadiq (a.s .) said:

“ Marry, but don’t give divorce, because it shakes the throne of Allah.”[111]

The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.a .) said:

“ Among all the permitted things nothing is more liked by Allah than marriage, and among all the permitted things nothing is more hated by Him than Divorce.”[112]

Divorce according to Islam is an indecent and unfavorable act, and one should remain away from it as far as possible. Because it shakes the Ark of Allah, but due to a reason it has not been forbidden. However, it is strongly hatred. Islamic thought tries to control the factors which lead to divorce. Some of which are mentioned below:

One of the causes of divorce is the cold attitude of the husband towards his legal wife, and attraction towards other women. This is caused mainly because women appear in the society withoutHijab , or have incompleteHijab , and the lustful eyes of men are hunting. When theeyes of man falls on a woman who is more beautiful and attractive than his wife, he would be fascinated by her, and becomes cool to his wife. When he returns home he makes untrue objections and excuses, which make their life sour, and many times it ends in divorce. To prevent this bad fate, Islam has advised women to observe theHijab properly, and not show her adornment to stranger men. They should not do make-up and attract, except for their husbands. On the other hand, men are advised not to look at stranger women, and to avoid useless and sweet talk. If at all their eyes falls on a stranger woman, they should not stare at her and should close their eyes at once.

The second cause in frequent divorces is the coolness of husband and wife with each other and their sexual relations. Many divorces and scandals are due to the fact that man or woman is not satisfied in sexual intercourse.

To prevent this, Islam has advised women to take their best clothes in the house, make up themselves as a favorite to their husbands. Husbands are also advised to observe cleanliness and hygiene. They should have proper haircut, trim the beard and live nicely at home. On the other side, they both are advised that at the time of intercourse, they should not be selfish, but should think about the mutual satisfaction.

(3) The third factor in divorce is bad behavior, bad ethics, objection, excuses and stubbornness of husband or wife. Statistics shows that maximum divorces are due to non-compatibility of the spouses.

To prevent this, and for the stability of the family Islam has prescribed duties for each of them, that should be regarded by them. They are also advised to refrain from selfishness, stubbornness and despotism and they should forgive each other; and the disputes should be solved amicably.

The moral duties of husband and wife are analyzed in the books of ethics, and some of them have been mentioned before.

(4) The fourth way employed by Islam to solve the marital disputes, and prevent divorce is the establishment of a committee of arbitrators. There are two persons in it. One is from the wife’s side, and the other chosen by husband. These two can be relatives or some other people.

The Qur’an says:

“ And if you fear a split between a man and his wife, then appoint a judge from his people, and a judge from her people; if they both desire reconciliation, Allah will bring harmony between them, surely Allah is Knowing Aware.”[113]

The arbitrators will arrange for a meetingو and invite the husband and wife to attend it. They will ask about the disputes with complete attention, listen to their grievances justly, find out the truth, and will give kind and friendly advice to the other side. They would make each of them familiar with their duties. Invite them for forgiveness, tolerance, assistance, duties towards the family, and efforts to make the marriage stable. They are also warned of the bad effects of separation and an agreement of peace is reached.

It should be said that the peace of arbitrators and reconciliation through enforcement of “ law” is very different. For reconciliation between two partners, two neighbors, or two enemies it is necessary that they do not cross the limits and trespass the rights of each other. But the reconciliation that Islam desires through the arbitrators committee is not the enforcement of law. It is to remove the grudge from the heart and to remove the factors of disputes and try to promote co-understanding. It commands them to take interest in the family, be warm towards life and normalize the relations between spouses. The merit of this over the former way is clear. However if the arbitrators after investigation and necessary procedure concludes that the disputes between spouses run very deep and the flame of love and interest of the family is completely extinguished and there is no hope for reconciliation, they advise them forgiveness and tolerance, and leave the husband and wife to themselves, till they separate from each other, or they suggest divorce.

(5) Payment of the dowry. The fifth thing, which can prevent divorce or delay it, is the payment of dowry. If the man had given the dowry earlier, he has no right to take it back; and if he has not paid it, it is his duty to pay it in full, while giving divorce.

The Qur’an says:

“ If you want to exchange one wife for another, and have given one of them a large sum of money, do not hold back any of it. Would you withhold it through slander and open sin?”

“ How can you hold it back when you have had intercourse with each other, and they have made a solemn agreement with you?”[114]

Dowry is the religious and legal right of wife, which could be collected in any possible way. If man has not paid it in advance, he should give it at the time of divorce. If the dowry comprises a property or a huge amount, it can prevent divorce to some extent. Especially for those who are poor and do not have enough money.

(6) Supervising and looking after the children: Supervising and looking after the children, and to bear their expenses are the responsibility of the husband. When theconditions of the family is normal, and husband and wife stay together the wife usually takes up the responsibility to look after the children. As a result men get the opportunity to work and bear the expenses of the family. But if they get separated due to divorce, then the supervision and looking after children is the responsibility of man; and to fulfill two responsibilities together is difficult. The children also need a mother, and the father cannot manage all these things alone.

Therefore, if the father thinks properly, and studies the negative consequences, he usually refrains from divorce. On this basis, the existence of children and the responsibility towards them can be a safeguard for stability of the family and is counted as a hurdle to divorce.

(7) The presence of two just witnesses: The validity of divorce requires in Islam depends on that two just persons be present at the time of the reciting of the formula of divorce. Namely;

First: For the divorce to be valid, it should be recited properly, which is not possible for everyone.

Second: At the time the divorce lecture is read, two just persons should be present, so that they listen to it and when required give witness.

In this way it is not so easy to find two just persons for witnessing the recitation of the lecture of divorce. Thus the husband cannot act in haste and later he may change his mind.

During this period the man may get cool, and leave his anger, and think about the bad results of divorce; problems in future. Friends and relatives can help him in this regards. Even when everything is ready, the learned judge who recites the marriage lecture and two just persons, they do not give the divorce at once, but try to remove their disagreements and reconcile them. In necessary case they can delay the divorce, to give more time to think about the consequences, and probably they change the mind. As Islam is against divorce, it has tried all possible ways to prevent it.

(8) The period during which a divorced woman cannot remarry: After all the stages, even when divorce is effected Islam does not end the marriage, but it has stipulated a period[115] and in a revocable divorce gives permission to the husband to renew the earlier marriage without any dowry or recitation of lecture.

Islam has laid much importance for protection of the marriage. Even after divorce, and in the “ waiting period” , opportunity is given to the husband to think properly, and if he has interest, he can renew the earlier marriage.

Think and Answer

1. What is the Islam’s view on divorce?

2. Among all the permissible things what is the most disliked?

3. What has Islam done to prevent divorce?

4. What are the causes of divorce? And how did Islam fight against them?

5. What is the function of the “Arbitration” committee?

6. How has Islam delayed the occurrence of divorce?

7. What is the result of delaying the divorce?

13. Philosophy of the legislation of Divorce

One may object to the legislation of divorce and say; “ If divorce is not liked by the legislator of Islam, as you mentioned earlier, why has He not forbidden it?” Can we join the permissibility and detestability of a subject together? Why did Islam allow divorce? What is its philosophy?

The reply is that divorce is bad and disliked. But in some circumstances it becomes necessary for the society, and it cannot be totally prevented. For example, to cut off a limb is painful and it is not liked. However, sometimes it is necessary for the well-being of the whole body, like in case of a cancer. In case of divorce, it is like that. It happens when the continuation of a married life is distressful, painful, and unbearable for both sides, and there is no solution except divorce.

For example, when the love and interest of man are totally finished and he does not like his spouse at all. In such circumstances, she loses the position of love, and the base of the family is ruined. Thehouse in which there is no love, is cold, dark, and fearful. Not only there is no comfort for the husband and wife, but also it is a dark prison and a burning hell.

Marriage is a natural relation between man and woman, and is different from contracts like sale, rent, company, and partnership. They are social contracts, and natural and sexual desires do not have role in them. While marriage is a natural relationship rooted in sexual intimacy of the spouses. Marriage creates internal attraction of male and female, and goes toward unity, and love.

To attract and to get attracted is natural, and it is placed in the nature of husband and wife. From the husband’s side love, desire and the company of wife is there.And from wife’s side make-up, attraction, to fill the heart, and company of the husband. The male desires to take his beloved, but the female wants to remain as the object of the husband’s desire, and to attract his heart.

Family rests on two pillars. If the husband and wife achieve their desires, the atmosphere of the family remains warm, fresh, and beautiful. Husband would be warm and hopeful toward hisfamily, and works hard for their comfort. The wife also considersherself successful and fortunate, and tries hard to look after the husband, and children.

If the husband does not love his legal wife and gets irritated by looking at her or by her company, and wife also feels that her husband does not love her anymore, then the family would lose the two pillars and will be ruined. Life in such a family becomes cool, and a rift is created between the partners. It is very difficult and painful for the spouses and its continuation is not good for them. In such circumstances, Islam does not like divorce, but sees it as a solution and allows it. The law of divorce applies to such situations.

The other situation is absence of mutual understanding!In case where the spouses do not have mutual understanding and think in opposite directions. Both of them are biased, selfish, and stubborn. Day and night they quarrel, fight, and argue; they do not listen to advices of the mediators nor follow the guidelines. They are not ready to change or improve themselves. Life in such a family is difficult, and its continuation neither benefits the wife nor the husband. In such a situation divorce is the only solution, and Islam allows it.

On this basis, divorce is a necessity of the society and a way of solving the problem, and it cannot be prohibited.

Someone may say that he accepts the permission of divorce in some circumstances, but the law of divorce is allowed freely, and a lustful person on any pretext would divorce his wife, who has spent her youth, energy, health, in the house of this disloyal husband. Now he just divorces her, and removes her from the house, and after that takes another wife. Is not such a divorce unjust on women?

In reply it can be said that Islam is also against divorce given by a lustful and brutal person and has fought with these factors. In order to endorse divorce it has put certain conditions and rules, and has brought hindrance to avoid divorce.

But if due to a reason the wife loses the affection of her husband, and he begins to hate her, what should be done, and what is the solution? The wife feels that she is not loved by her husband anymore, and he hates her. Such a condition is worse and an insult and punishment for the wife. Is it better for her to stay at home by the force of law, and stop separation? Law can compel the wife to remain in the house, and compel the husband to pay for her food and clothes; but law cannot create love, which is the basis of family life. Here too, although Islam does not like divorce, it sees it as a solution and allows it.

One may say that if divorce is in some cases necessary, and a way of solving the problem, why is it left to the discretion of husband only, and women are not given the right to divorce?As all these situations can arise for women too. It is possible that wife may not like the husband and get irritated to continue the mutual life. When there is no love, the life of the family is practically over, and woman should be given the right to divorce her husband and announces the end of the mutual life.

We say, lack of interest of woman does not signify the end of marriage. It is a sign of the mistakes or errors of man, and his shortcomings in his relationship, his performance of family life, and looking after the wife.Because the key of love and interest of the wife is in the hands of the husband. If theman really loves his wife and express it to her, performs his duties towards her and improves his behavior, the wife will become warm, hopeful, and takes interest in him and would try to attract his heart.

Therefore, if the wifedose not have interest in her husband and life, it shows that the husband has shortcomings.

In such situations divorce is not necessary. The man should be reminded of his duties and to look after the wife, so that he can correct his actions, talks, and behavior; and should try to fill the heart of his wife, and make her warm and hopeful.

One may say that if a husband beats his wife or does not pay for her expenses, and behaves harshly with her, does not performs intercourse, gives her trouble and hurts her, or abuses her and also refuses to divorce her, in such situations what can she do? She must be patient and bear the torture, as long as she is alive? Why the right of divorce is not given to the woman, so that she can get ridoff such a painful prison?

It can be replied that Islam is based on justice and observes the rights of all sides, and does not support bad behavior and injustice towards the wife. It never allows this. Islam is absolutely against it, and defends the rights of women.

In such cases women can refer to the “ Arbitration” institution, and request them to advise the husband that he should treat her with justice. If they get the opportunity and succeeded, they can continue their life, but if he does not accepts this, she can claim to the Legal authority. The court calls the offending husband and orders him to refrain from injustice and oppression, and to perform his duty. If he doesn’t accept it, the court sentences him to divorce, and if again he refuses, the competent legal authority will directly issue the order of divorce.

Think and Answer

1. If divorce is bad why Islam has not banned it?

2. When is divorce the best option?

3. How does Islam deals with a man who is lustful and divorces his wife?

4. Why does man have the final right in divorce?

5. What does lack of love of a wife in her husband indicate?

6. How can man make his wife interested in life?

7. What is the right of a woman whose husband hurts her?

Notes